How to Survive a Horror Movie

All the Skills to Dodge the Kills

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Pub Date 24 Sep 2019 | Archive Date 15 Oct 2019

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Description

Written by the screenwriter and producer behind Stephen King’s It, and with an introduction by horror icon Wes Craven (A Nightmare on Elm Street), this is a hilarious must-read for any horror movie fan—and it just might save your life

Are you reading this in a cornfield, at a summer camp, or in an abandoned mental institution? Have you noticed that everything is poorly lit, or that music surges every time you open a door? If the answer is yes, you’re probably trapped in a horror movie. But don’t freak out—just read this book! With it you will learn how to overcome every obstacle found in scary films, including:

• How to determine what type of horror film you’re trapped in
• The five types of slashers and how to defeat them
• How to handle killer dolls, murderous automobiles, and other haunted objects
• How to deal with alien invasions, zombie apocalypses, and other global threats
• What to do if you did something last summer, if your corn has children in it, or if you suspect you’re already dead
 
So don't be afraid: no vampire, zombie horde, cannibal hillbilly, Japanese vengeance ghost, or other horror movie monster can hurt you—as long as you have this book.
Written by the screenwriter and producer behind Stephen King’s It, and with an introduction by horror icon Wes Craven (A Nightmare on Elm Street), this is a hilarious must-read for any horror movie...

Available Editions

EDITION Other Format
ISBN 9781683691464
PRICE $14.99 (USD)
PAGES 176

Average rating from 32 members


Featured Reviews

How to Survive a Horror Movie is pure fun. It's a quick read; I flew threw it in a couple of hours, but I loved every minute of it. The humor was spot-on, and I loved all the subtle and not-so-subtle references to horror movies. Highly recommended for the casual horror movie fan and the horror movie buff alike.

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First, let me say that I'm a big fan of Seth Grahame Smith already. I've read his vampire hunter novels and loved them. I was excited when I saw this book featured on Netgalley, and I'm grateful I was approved for it. It's very funny. There were a few times I actually laughed out loud. The format was great. I really liked how the chapters were broken down and all the extra bits of information. It was fun reading through the movie list at the back. I've seen most of them and I'm planning on watching the few I haven't. This was a very quick read. I finished it in one sitting. It was very entertaining and I would recommend it to other horror fans! I am booktuber and I'll be mentioning this book in my monthly wrapup.

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A fun volume for any horror-lover's library! Grahame-Smith gives tongue-in-cheek advice for the most popular horror movie scenarios. At the back of the volume is a list of films that all horror-lovers should have on their radar, from mainstream to cult classic. A quick and enjoyable read, with fun illustrations and an introduction from Wes Craven himself.

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What a riot this book was! Any discerning horror movie fan will love this survival guide if you somehow find yourself in the Terrorverse. Filled with puns and poking fun at the cliches that make the genre what it is, this is a joyous homage to the glory that is horror in all of its various forms. There are tips to check whether or not you yourself are in fact already dead, useful hints for detecting demon possession with the subtle use of dogs and commiseration for those of us who are unfortunately not attractive enough to make it to the end credits. My only criticism is that it just wasn't long enough - I could have read a 500 page tome on this subject and loved every minute of it. Overall, this is a really funny and quick read that I would recommend to anyone who knows not to run upstairs when you should be running out of the door!
I received a free copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for a fair and honest review.

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How to Survive a Horror Movie is humorous and entertaining. This is well written and quirky. I will buy this book for gifts when it comes out.

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While written in a tongue-in-cheek way, this book is actually really good for film students.
Throughout its chapters it looks at tropes, character archetypes and sub genres of the modern cinema world.
There’s a few elements similar to ‘choose your own adventure story’ and I just wish they’d played on that a little more.

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Definitely a different take on a horror, Interesting and fun, with advice and takes on horror movie survival, it’s absolutely hilarious and I do wish it were a little spookier

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Quirk Books sent me a digital copy of this oldie but goodie. I think this must be a new edition but couldn't tell. I missed this one entirely and am tickled that they have my taste in books pretty much pinned down. After reading this, I'm only like 70% sure that I'm not living in a horror movie. :)

Chapters include:

- How to Perform an Exorcism<br>- What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer<br>- How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheriff<br>- How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll<br>- How to Survive an Alien Invasion<br>- How to Tell If You've Been Dead Since the Beginning of the Movie

It's so, so funny. I want to buy a hard copy to have it on my shelf. I didn't realize that the author also wrote Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, which explains how he knows so much about the subject of horror movies.

For example

What are the ten ways to determine if your house is haunted? (Do your faucets bleed? Does the house tell you to "get out"? Are you strangely compelled to murder your entire family with an ax every time you arrive home? If the answer is "yes" to all of these, chances are good your house is haunted)

SGS goes over everything that would come up in a horror movie, and there are even illustrations to guide the reader survival mode.

Its the perfect gift for the horror movie fan in your world.

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How To Survive a Horror Movie is a revised copy of the book first published in 2007. If you have a copy of the 2007 issue I’d say that you wouldn’t really need to purchase the revised version. On the other hand, if you’ve never read this before then definitely pick yourself up a copy.
Seth has a great sense of humour and it shines through in this tome of surviving the common mistakes characters of modern horror films always seem to make. It is absolutely hilarious, with advice like “The horror movie day is still 24 hours, but 21 of those are night”, and “There are only three months in the horror movie year, July, October and December”.
We all yell the same things at the TV when watching horror movies, in total disbelief at the stupidity of the characters making the same mistakes over and over again leaving to their demise. Seth makes the same observations with his trademark humour.
I’d give this book a 5 out of 5

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When you watch a scary movie, do you put yourself in place of one of the characters? Do you wonder what you would do in a similar situation?
I have always been bothered by the silly girl who hits the killer once, then flails off screaming. I’d bash him into unconsciousness, then tie him up! ( I know how to foil a vampire,werewolf and zombie.) This book is a survival manual with references to horror movies you are familiar with.
It is totally enjoyable and you will love reliving scenes of your favorite movies. I have received a free copy of this book and am writing my review voluntarily.

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As a lifelong horror movie fan, I absolutely loved this book! There are tons of references to horror moves and at the back of the book is a must watch list of movies. The artwork included was well done and I would highly recommend this book to horror movie fans.

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***Thanks to the publisher and #NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review***

An insightful and hilarious guide to surviving a horror movie. Cleverly written, this book pokes fun and sheds light on all of the situations in which you could die in a horror movie. Wes Craven writes the introduction!

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