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book cover for The Politics of Lonely

The Politics of Lonely

Why Is Friendship So Hard?

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Pub Date Sep 10 2026 | Archive Date Dec 18 2026

Columbia University Press | Fernwood Publishing


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Description

Why is it hard to make and keep friends as an adult? Even if you finally find time to see each other, can you connect more deeply than just catching up over coffee? How many do you count as ride-or-die pals who’ll always show up with effervescent banter and deep conversation — your “chosen family?”

Widespread loneliness reflects a world of crappy jobs and unaffordable housing that makes it almost impossible to have close, interwoven friendships. A dwindling social safety net takes a toll on us and on our relationships. Particularly for queer people, friendships can be crucial relations of equality, constancy, and care. Still, we disappoint each other and fall into irreparable conflict.

A less lonely world is possible. Through interviews, research, and personal narrative, this book shows how people build tight connections despite living in the austere conditions of colonial capitalism — boldly weaving a new social fabric as this one unravels.

Why is it hard to make and keep friends as an adult? Even if you finally find time to see each other, can you connect more deeply than just catching up over coffee? How many do you count as...


Available Editions

EDITION Paperback
ISBN 9781773638263
PRICE $22.00 (USD)
PAGES 254

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BISAC Codes

FAM021000 FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS / Friendship
FAM056000 FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS / LGBTQ+
FAM060000 FAMILY & RELATIONSHIPS / Chosen Family