The Secret Lives of Church Ladies is an interesting collection of short stories centred on Black women that explores race, independence, sexuality, family, and faith.

Let me start by saying this is an important set of stories. We don't often see collections like this focusing on the Black experience, and this collection shows a range of experiences from the perspective of Black women.

I enjoyed most of the stories, but the collection didn't really resonate with me. I wanted more depth and more nuance in the stories in general. None of the characters or stories stuck with me. That being said, it's not poorly written by any means, and I recognize that I am not the target audience for this collection.

Overall, I think this book is a decent read, and it's worth the time if you're in the mood for short stories.

The Secret Lives of Church Ladies is a short story collection exploring themes of queerness, womanhood, and faith. It mostly follows women living "unconventional" lives who find ways to own their femininity, sexuality, and sense of self. It also challenges the Christian conventions that often put undue pressure on women to be "well behaved".

I'm of two minds about this short story collection. Although I was incredibly invested in some of the stories, I find myself already forgetting the details of them despite sitting down to write this review only a day after I finished reading the collection.

Ultimately, I think what makes this collection difficult for me to love is the frequent exploration of the subject of infidelity. The collection doesn't condone it exactly, but it's not a subject I enjoy reading multiple stories about. If only one or two of the stories had featured it, I might not have had such a hard time with the collection. Although I think I understand what the author was trying to do by tackling this subject, it just didn't quite work for me.

Nevertheless, I thought the writing in this collection was very good. Quite a few stories were told in creative and clever ways that had me raising an eyebrow, impressed and pleased. Philyaw is definitely an author I would consider reading again.

At the end of the day, this collection left me feeling like I needed to reread it to fully appreciate it. It left me feeling contemplative, and I think that's a very good thing.

What a great collection of stories! The characters are so real; flawed and wonderful, each looking to for some peace in their lives. The writing is sharp and nuanced, a pleasure to read. I also appreciate the undercurrent of community, church and otherwise, that permeates the collection as a whole. It really speaks to the long term influence of these environs and how their presence is revealed again and again throughout life. I can't wait to recommend this to my library patrons because the myriad of Black lives showcased here, matter.

A collection of nine short stories that are at times poignant, comedic, heartbreaking, and unflinchingly honest. The stories each have a unique voice and structure and are told through the voices of ten Black women of various ages. Some themes among the stories include God, religion, freedom, acceptance, and love: self-love, love among family, love between friends, sex, lovers.

It is thought provoking and explores Christianity, people's beliefs, and what happens when someone doesn't believe or acts in ways that are against those beliefs, but doesn't impose a right or a wrong onto what is happening. It gives the reader an intimate view of these women's lives, hopes, fears, and actions. I don't know what else to write other than I recommend that you read this book, whoever you are, and where ever you are in your life. You will find something in here.

I received an advance copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

The stories in The Secret Lives of Church Ladies are unflinchingly honest. What do you do when your life doesn't fit into the box prescribed by your religious beliefs? What happens when your spiritual leader sins openly? Do you have to choose between being loved and being good? The stories are heartbreaking, funny, and (most of all) real. An engaging, thought-provoking book for anyone who is open to viewing organized religion through a critical lens.

Wow, I am struggling to even come up with words to describe this book.

The Secret Lives of Church Ladies is a collection of short stories. It drops the reader into a snapshot of the lives of nine Black women. It’s raw, it’s real and it’s beautiful. It explores the depths of different individuals and the struggles each individual is going through. From a 14 year old girl who is in love with the Preacher’s wife…to a lonely woman trying to find comfort in another as she waits for her mother to pass from terminal cancer….to a woman who must first learn to love herself before she is able to love another.

I went into this galley with no expectations. I knew that it would be short but I didn’t think I would fly through it like I did. I didn’t just read this in a day….I inhaled this story, it was all consuming! These women are so real; I felt like I knew them. Their unique stories were personal, original and each entirely their own.

This is a collection of intimate, unflinching stories about navigating relationships and identity. I don't read too many short story collections in full, so I may not be exactly the right person to review this, but I appreciated the breadth of voices represented here and the careful details included about their lives. If you are interested in vivid, reflective stories in inventive voices and formats that are focused on intimacy and family, particularly challenging familial or community expectations, you will likely enjoy this collection.

The Secret Lives of Church Ladies is a collection of short stories that centers around generations of black women who are flawed, trying to embrace their individuality as well as live outside the box of the religion & doctrines. Some are queer women afraid of what ifs, some are queer woman out already but still failed by family and society. Some are women uncomfortable in their skins and bodies. Some are people who don't give two fucks about the set rules and how life is "supposed" to be. Each of these women are navigating life slow and steady, wobbly on their feet, holding onto others for safety and assurance, some of them have only themselves too. Some have found solace in religion. Some are questioning it and everything they are been spoon-fed. They are all human! They are sassy! They are funny. They are quirky.

Every moment in this book felt authentic, real, raw. Experiences of these black women are the same thing other black women go though in the real world. Each story has weight. Each story hit deep for me, though some more than others. I especially loved the 4th story: How to Make Love to A Physicist. There was just something about that story. The way body positivity & acceptance, finding happiness & love was explored while talking about science and the concept of fate was amazing to me.

So many themes were explored; queerness, race, gender, religion, sexuality, identities and many more. This book is phenomenal. Take it from me. Add it to your ever growing TBR. It deserves to be there. Read it when it's out September 1st. When you do, I'm here to discuss it with you! Love it! love it! Five shiny stars!!

Wow, what an experience this was! So intimately told, I felt like I was peeping through the curtains of the women and girls in this collection rather than reading words on the page.

Deesha Philyaw’s characters are perfectly flawed, yet strong and fierce, despite their adversity. Navigating themes of friendship, mothers, daughters, loyalty, longing and sexuality, we see what is revealed when a woman unzips and steps out of the fabric of expectations and prejudices that she wears in the world. Religion is an underlying theme in all the stories and the struggles good Christian black women have balancing the love of their God and their desires.

The absence of fathers is also a reoccurring theme, and while the underlying foundation of many stories are tragic, Philyaw doesn’t want you feeling sorry for her characters. I laughed out loud a few times.

I loved this. So very much. Such a beautifully written book. Such an important book. One that you must read as soon as possible.

Thank you to the author, publisher and Netgalley for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for my honest review.

I requested this book of short stories based on its highly favorable reviews. Sadly, I did not have the same positive experience. Although the writing was often good, there were too many jarring notes that took me out of the story. (E.g., it seemed implausible that a pious grandmother would not have known the famous biblical backstory of the name "Jael," which she chose for her unsettling granddaughter.)

Many thanks to NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Deesha Philyaw examines the complexities of the relationships between women: mothers and daughters, grandmothers, friends, and the eyes of the community. Philyaw moves past any superficial performance of her “church ladies,” pulling back layers of pride to sit with moments of hurt, disappointment, questioning. In the story “Peach Cobbler,” a daughter watches a mother navigate her role as “the other woman,” of an adulterer, her famous dessert at the center of this dance, a symbol of the temporary nature of sweetness and desire. In the straightforward and sharp story, “Instructions for Married Christian Husbands,” the narrator talks directly to this kind of using man: “if guilt gets the beat of you, do not attempt to witness me or invite me to church. Don’t ask me to repent, because I regret nothing. You can’t save me because I’m not in peril.” Through and beyond different situations that challenge the women of these stories, Philyaw gives each of them a clear strength and persistence; never a hitch in their voices. These “secrets” show us Black women surviving and daring to tell the truth of what’s they’ve been asked to carry along the way.

A very different read for me and one I really, really enjoyed.
A collection of short stories exploring the intimate lives of black African American women, the characters of which were very real. I have my favourites but all were without a doubt compelling and a delight to read.
Highly recommended!

What a treasure chest of stories this is! Bolstered by a common setting in a specific community, they wander about, focusing first here then there to sample significant events and relationships of old and young ladies and how they are framed by their relationship with their church. I am going to say this now because it's always bothered me: there is little in the way of formal religion as a background in the life of characters in literary novels about white people. Marilynne Robinson is a standout and has a new chapter of the Gilead series coming out soon. But the connection is often there and flavors the stew when the author is BIPOC (not a great term, but descriptive). Think of the wonderful Deacon King Kong. These church ladies are a pleasure to meet and will enrich the reader's inner life.

The term "church ladies" conjures images of elderly ladies with hats and sturdy shoes, filing into church on a Sunday morning. None of those ladies appear in these stories! The ladies in these stories are adult women with unique issues, a variety of romantic situations, and modern outlooks. It's well-written, with realistic dialogue that illuminates each story. These stories tell tales of several lives, each compelling in its own way.

The nine stories that make up The Secret Lives of Church Ladies feature women of every age and several sexual orientations, all trying to find a bit of happiness or peace. They look for it in peach cobbler, with men and with women, at church, through work and in their children and mothers and sisters. Author Deesha Philyaw introduces a string of finely detailed characters, each with a fully formed worldview. My favorite story was "How to Make Love to a Physicist," but there are no bad stories in the collection. Highly recommended!

The title of this book says exactly what is needed to know before reading it, and it was the first thing that made me know I had to read it. What a perfect title AND what a gorgeous cover.
I usually have problems rating books that contain multiple short stories because I often enjoy a lot some of the stories but I don't like a couple of them. This is not the case. I really enjoyed all of the stories that were told here. I have some favorites, of course, but all of them gave me this feeling that comes after a shockingly great experience, and I love that.
All of the characters felt so real that I sometimes had problems to remember these are fictional stories.
I can't wait for the world to get this beautiful collection.

This is a collection of short stories primarily centred around black women. The title of the story piques your curiosity, you badly want to know the secrets of church women and you're hoping they're dirty secrets (winks).
This book definitely lives up to its title, I absolutely loved all the stories but I had a couple of favourites ('How To Make Love To A Physicist' and 'Instructions for Married Christian Husbands)

I had a myriad of emotions while reading this book, some stories were sad, others made me smile and some moments were filled with lots of laughter.
This collection is a satirical piece that discusses themes like religion, love, sex, family etc.

The stories are unexpected but they are very familiar, they are stories we've known all our lives and Deesha Philyaw does an amazing job telling them.

Everyone should read this!

This is a fantastic collection of intertwined short stories about Black lesbian and bi life in America. I loved Philyaw's honesty, original voice, and ability to express complex emotions--desire, jealousy, the pain of rejection. Philyaw writes about the contradictions and hypocrisy present in Black communities and, in particular, in churches and among church-going people. This is a book that should be on every high-school reading list, that should be in every book club's library, and on recommended lists and prominently displayed and hand-sold in bookshops.

These are wonderful stories. All a little bit different, but each featuring a church lady that is instantly recognizable to any black woman from the South. There's the woman who is saving herself for marriage, the family of women who only share a father, the woman sleeping with the a church leader. Philyaw asks readers to reflect on the truths and misconceptions around 'church ladies,' the differences between what they say and do, but doesn't make the assumption that these are bad women or good women. They're just women, just people trying to make it as best they can.

I chose this book initially because I loved the cover (it's so great) and was also intrigued by the title. I have been wanting to read more broadly, to get fresh perspectives, and to pick up more books by authors of color (despite being a POC myself, my books tend largely toward white authors and I grew up in a predominantly white culture.) This book definitely gave me insight into the lives of Black women, and while I usually steer clear of short stories because I feel I am just getting into the characters when the narrative ends, I thought each of these were well-done vignettes that didn't leave me needing more.

There was more sorrow than joy in these stories and more loss of belief than faith. The melancholy, bitterness, rage, and sorrow is occasionally tempered by joy, self-discovery, and resolve in these stories, and I did finish it feeling like I had gotten a peek into the lives of Black women today. As a practicing Christian, these stories were heartbreaking to me. It felt like no one's faith made much of a difference in how they lived their lives, that instead the church had scarred instead of supported them. They were, rightfully, jaded by the hypocrisy. This rings true but is hard to read anyway.

Although very different, I think this would be a good comp with American Housewife by Helen Ellis.