I was really intrigued by the premise of this book. I can’t think of any other books I have read which look at the experience of children who are a different race to their parents. I also thought that I would relate to Rowan's experience with men.
Thanks to NetGalley and Kaylie Jones Books for an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
This book follows Rowan, who was adopted from Korea by white parents. It follows her life as a child through to adulthood as she tries to grapple with her past and forge her own identity.
I really enjoyed the way the subject matter was handled from the perspective of Rowan as an adoptive daughter. Especially in the scenes when she was younger, comparing her experience as an adoptee with others.
Sometimes it felt as though the narrative was too rushed. There were also a number of instances where I think more could have been gained in the story as a whole if the narrative included the mother's perspective too.
Overall for me this was a 3 star read.

Inconvenient Daughter is about transracial adoption, having your sens of belonging questioned, building your identity while growing up. I really find that topic interesting, and this type of book, even when they're fiction like it's the case here can really help some readers with their own similar questions and issues. This is almost a self-help book.

Although I thought the book would be a linear piece of fiction following Rowan on her journey through self-discovery, but it was not exactly that. It's more a book regrouping slices of Rowan's life, in a somewhat random way. I really believe that it's something important to point out because I might not have picked it up if I had known it was built like this. Some people love slice of life books, but I personnaly don't, or at least not much.

Since the narration is from Rowan's POV, and that she's struggling with life and taking some space to reflect on some stuff, the narration was a little shaky sometimes, which was really a good way to immerse the reader in her mind. I like those unreliable-y narrators, those moments when you realize there's much more going on than what they know or are seeing. Love it.

My problem with the book, and the reason I'm rating it 3 stars is the fact that there is no linear timeline in the story. We keep jumping between Rowan's present and past every few pages, and it annoyed me. The chapters are also never long enough to truly get into the events unfolding, and then you get thrown in another period of Rowan's life, that you can only identify after reading several pages, which left me confused A LOT OF THE TIME. I hate not being able to place the events I'm reading, and it made me try to think harder about what I was reading, focusing more, making me more tired, which is not what I want to do when I read fiction like this. I want to go with the flow and not try to piece things together. Which is also why I don't like reading thrillers much ahah

So yeah, that was a strange read, that left me extremely confused most of the time, but the meaning of the story is really powerful and deserved a different way of telling it. If you are someone who enjoys peculiar books, with deep, dark action, that's for you, but that style was definitely not for me !

I have always been curious about adoption - specifically what it would feel like to be an adopted child and even moreso what it would feel like to be adopted by parent(s) of a different race. When I read about this debut - Inconvenient Daughter by Lauren Sharkey - I was immediately intrigued, and I'm here to report that I was not disappointed. Sharkey presents the reader with a first-person narrative that so vividly portrays the angst and insecurities of the female adolescent protagonist, Rowan, that I had to make sure this really was a novel and not a memoir. The need to belong is powerful, and this novel underscores the theme in an insightful and page-turning manner. Rowan gambles her future away when she mistakenly believes she is not loved by her adopted mother and turns to "men" to grant her the status of being #1 to someone, only to find out that she loses herself in the process. Perhaps she was her own worst enemy after all. Finally, in this era of the #metoo movement, this novel will appeal to a wide audience of women of all ages.

Publisher Synopsis: Rowan Kelly knows she’s lucky. After all, if she hadn’t been adopted, she could have spent her days in a rice paddy, or a windowless warehouse assembling iPhones–they make iPhones in Korea, right? Either way, slowly dying of boredom on Long Island is surely better than the alternative. But as she matures, she realizes that she’ll never know if she has her mother’s eyes, or if she’d be in America at all had her adoptive parents been able to conceive.

Rowan sets out to prove that she can be someone’s first choice. After running away from home–and her parents’ rules–and ending up beaten, barefoot, and topless on a Pennsylvania street courtesy of Bad Boy Number One, Rowan attaches herself to Never-Going-to-Commit. When that doesn’t work out, she fully abandons self-respect and begins browsing Craigslist personals. But as Rowan dives deeper into the world of casual encounters with strangers, she discovers what she’s really looking for.

With a fresh voice and a quick wit, Lauren J. Sharkey dispels the myths surrounding transracial adoption, the ties that bind, and what it means to belong.

Review:

I was in desperate need of a book that had me glued to the pages from start to finish, and Lauren J Sharkey has delivered. This sombre tale of an adopted Asian girl is similar to the works of Hanya Yanagihara, and had A Little Life vibes throughout.

Normally, when writing reviews I like to keep notes as i’m progressing through the book, however like I previously said, I was glued to this one, so much so that I didn’t make any notes.

This book, in it’s entirety is flawless. The writing is perfect and the story is gripping. You do truly feel the emotions of the characters and empathise with them. I am not adopted, but I could certainly relate to a low of Rowans feelings throughout adolescence. By the end of the book though, my heart hurt the most for Rowans Mum.

Gripping from start to finish, with a different kind of happy ending that what we are all used to.

My sincerest thanks to Netgalley and Akashic Books for a copy of this book in exchange for my review.

5 stars.

Well wow first of all this book is A LOT. Rowan is a Korean girl who was adopted very young by her white American family. Interracial adoption has always intrigued me as I used to be a childcare provider in a very privileged area and was wondering how some of the kids would fare later in life. Without giving too much away... I don't feel like the way Rowan goes on later in life has anything to do with her adoptive mom. I wish there was more background and in depth look at the relationship with her mom, I feel we readers were were only given the surface level so it seemed like Rowan was just being extreme. I read this book in one sitting so it did have my attention. The plot goes back and forth with the past and present and most of the time it was easy to tell, but sometimes I had no idea which "life of Rowan" I was reading about. In the end I feel like I finished this book being like that's it? Felt myself wanting more, but I won't take away from how it was an overall captivating read.

*for this book TRIGGER WARNING: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE*

Thank you to NetGalley for the advanced copy of this book. This book is very intense and I recommend caution to those that sexual trauma will be extremely triggering. At times very difficult to read but very powerful in its narrative description and development of the plot. I think that this is an author who has many stories to tell and I look forward to reading more of them

This was a great read. I finished it within 48 hours of receiving it from NetGalley.

This book is about a young woman navigating growing up as a transracially adopted child and struggling to find acceptance, love and belonging. A lot of it is extremely relatable because deep down, even if it’s just a little bit, sometimes we all feel like we are not enough and we are all craving to belong. Today people are more easily connected than ever, but also more isolated than ever.

I especially found the protagonist’s relationship with her mother touching and I’m not going to lie, some parts brought tears to my eyes. Since I know that this novel is written based on some of Sharkey’s experience, my heart ached for the protagonist and her mom.

All in all, a great debut and I can’t wait to see what else Sharkey will write about next!

Thank you to NetGalley and Kaylie Jones Books for an advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

This book tells the story of Rowan, a girl from South Korea, who was adopted at 3 months old into a White American family. Throughout the book, the author (Lauren J. Sharkey) beautifully weaves in her own experiences as a transracial adopted girl, to tell the story of a girl grappling with the sense of not being enough. This is something that is experienced by girls in all situations, adopted or not, but Sharkey poignantly encapsulates the struggles when you have no sense of belonging. Rowan doesn't feel good enough for her biological mother (BioMom) or her adoptive mother (mom), and how her choices in the past are influencing her presently.

I liked this story, and it was a good example of a debut novel that has been well done for the most part and provokes thought. Having said this, at times the weaving between present and past was confusing - there was not always a clear separation that allowed me to understand what was happening presently and what was in the past. I also felt that the ending, while it worked, was a bit disappointing.

I would recommend this book if you are looking for a contemporary book that explores relatable issues in an interesting, multicultural way.

This started off so well but ended up being disappointing.

I have read a few memoirs on transracial adoption so I was really excited to see the issues it can raise explored in fiction, but this didn’t quite do that for me.

Rowan is adopted and so grows up feeling unwanted. This leads to her internalising negative messages about her worth and value. All this makes sense and I can imagine is pretty common among adoptees.

However Rowan as a teenager starts to act out and it spirals alarmingly to where we find Rowan at the beginning of the book.

A real issue for me was understanding the link between her transracial adoption and how she came to think of herself. From the book, it’s clear that Rowan understands that she is loved. At least on some level anyway. Sadly this character has no sense of self preservation whatsoever and it’s heart breaking actually.

Perhaps it’s the loss of culture and not seeing yourself in your own world.

However the escalation just doesn’t quite make sense to me. it’s weird because the sort of high risk behaviour Rowan exhibits is common in children who have been sexually assaulted so I did wonder if this could have ever been the case but by the end it’s clear that Rowan’s family weren’t abusive towards her.

Some of her actions smack more of a certain kind of privilege that she has no idea she possesses. Ultimately, the story lacks depth and is rather a surface exploration of fleeting and ever changing emotions.

The first person writing style helps readers to see things from her perspective and it’s quite harrowing to view everything she goes through. Additionally in terms of writing style, it is fast paced and flits from past to present. The time jumps don’t quite work for me because it is confusing; at first I was looking out for demarcations or chapter changes.

I liked that she expresses conflicting emotions surrounding identity and shows how complex mother daughter relationships can be.

I the book could work well for a younger audience.

Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC

Thank you to Kaylie Jones Books & NetGalley for the Advanced Reader's Copy!

Available June 23rd 2020

Like any good drama show, Lauren J Sharkey's "Inconvenient Daughter" centers itself around a primary conflict. In Sharkey's case, it's the endless series of misunderstandings between Rowan Joy Kelly, a Korean adoptee, and her well-intentioned mother. Beginning with Rowan's teenage years, Sharkey shows us Rowan's complicated battle to her own identity as she grows up in a majority white community and struggles to overcome self-doubt. Always, whether she is going to her classes at her Catholic high school or she is partying in Cabrini College, Rowan questions her own self-worth. Despite the best intentions of her mother, she feels isolated and unable to cope. "Inconvenient Daughter" is a tender, emotional and realistic read about mothers and daughters that gives no easy answers.

Adoption is seen as a wonderful time for all involved especially as the promotion is so positive.
However, the dynamics between both involved when a young Korean girl is raised in an Anglo-Saxon enviroment becomes splintered when doubt, jealousy, love and parenting becomes an obstacle with conseqences for all involved.
The family breakdown leads to a heartrending time with Rowan searching for love making choices driven by the knowledge that her bio mom gave her away. Feeling rejected with self esteem gone leads to decisions to replace the love missing in her life.
This is an independent review thanks to NetGalley / Akashic Books / Kaylie Jones Books

Thanks to NetGalley and Kaylie Jones books for an advanced copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

Inconvenient Daughter is a beautifully written book which keeps the reader engaged until the end.

The story follows Rowan, an adopted Korean girl to caucasian American parents. Rowan struggles with identity, family dynamics and the feeling of belonging, causing great problems with her self esteem.

The author takes on some delicate issues such as infertility and adoption to controlling relationships and abuse but with due care and sensitivity.

This powerful book is full of heartbreak and joy which brought tears to my eye.

A must read.

This novel tells the story of a transracially adopted girl, coming to terms with a sense of belonging and being enough. Sharkey manages to beautifully integrate her own experiences into the story of Rowan, and her relationships with others, especially her adoptive mother.

The book jumps in time from the here and now to Rowan's past, which I really liked since what is happening to her now is always connected somehow to what happened in the past. Although sometimes it wasn't executed very well which made it confusing to read. The book is very fast-paced, which makes you want to read more and more. However, I felt like the ending was a bit rushed and was not very satisfactory.

Overall, I enjoyed this book, especially since I could relate to Rowan's experiences a lot. As I said, it reads very fast and straightforward, making it an easy read, even though it deals with some heavier topics.

“All these years I thought I was trying to silence The Voice, but really, I was trying to deny what I already knew to be true: BioMom had regifted me like a scented candle reeking of gingerbread and sugar cookies. There was something inherent in me which made it easy for people to walk away.”

At times, “Inconvenient Daughter”, was hard to follow. The timeline jumped around and there was no real marker or distinction between the past and the present, so it often left me confused when I first started the book.

That being said, however, I was completely mesmerized by Lauren J. Sharkey’s novel. The protagonist, Rowan, searches for her life’s purpose. However, she finds that she can’t really do that when her whole life has been grown from her deepest insecurities of abandonment that came from adoption. This book is a story of self-discovery and self love, but also one of mother and daughter strife, finding the balance between healthy relationships and unhealthy, and knowing when and how to set boundaries for yourself. Sharkey doesn’t give all of the solutions to these dilemmas at the end of “Inconvenient Daughter” but the fact is, the real world may never give us those answers either.

I highly recommend this book, but I do caution people that there are triggers in here, especially if you are someone who has experienced an unhealthy/unsafe relationship, and if you have grown up in a family touched by adoption.

“I realized it wasn’t The Voice I was hearing—it was me. The Voice was the part of myself I refused to acknowledge—the part that knew who I was.”

I got this book in Net Galley and was intrigued by the subject of an adopted child in a family of a different race. The story is about Rowan Kelly, who was adopted at 3 months old from Korea. Rowan grows up on Long Island with her Caucasian parents and an adopted brother also from Korea.

Rowan seems to be a typical kid, defiant at times and eager to lead her own life her own way. There is never any indication that her parents didn't love her or care for here, yet her behavior looks very much like, a clinical case of oppositional defiant disorder. Rowan is not particularly interested in her Korea heritage, but at some point looks into her background with information from the adoption agency, which helps to fuel her feelings of rejection and worthlessness.

Rowan acts out and takes off with on a long run of destruction. It is like a very long scream, raw and frightening as it is absence of any logic, as we read about the pain she inflicts on herself. Her parents seem to be MIA, and it only gets worse.

The writing is uneven, but does convey the pain Rowan was going through. The book runs out of steam at the end, without and conclusions, as Rowan just stops her destructive behavior.

The book is a fast read, not complicated and straight forward. It just leaves a lot of open questions, and would have been more satisfying if the writer had more depth in the development of the characters.

*Thank you to Net Galley and Kaylie Jones Books for this advance copy. Much appreciated!*

Inconvenient Daughter is a compelling debut from Lauren J. Sharkey. The book begins with 24-year-old Rowan Kelly undergoing an examination at the hospital after a sexual encounter. Sharkey then takes us back ten years to when Rowan is fourteen years old and taking her Catholic school entrance exams. Both Rowan and her younger brother, Aiden, were adopted, separately, from Korea by a white couple living on Long Island.

As Rowan goes through her formative years at an all girls’ Catholic school, her relationship with her adopted mother becomes strained. They have the usual mother-daughter fights, but Rowan escalates their arguments begins to feel unwanted by her adoptive mother. She then begins to wonder about her biological mom and why, in her view, she wasn’t wanted by her, either. This feeling of not being good enough Rowan accepts as truth and it becomes to foundation of her relationships with her friends, family, and the boys and men she dates throughout the next ten years.

Sharkey has written that is almost impossible to put down. Each chapter begins with a glimpse into the present day before going back to where the past left off in the previous chapter. It’s a rewarding form of storytelling as you can see who Rowan was and who has become. Rowan’s story is heartbreaking and you want to root for her, but she continuously makes poor choices. It’s easy to understand why given how little she values herself.

Rowan is a young lady from Korea, adopted by American parents. She knows she's lucky. As time goes on, though, she starts to blame her mom, and convinces herself that her mom hates her. This sends Rowan on a journey of searching for herself, and for the reason why her biological mother "abandoned" her.

The Review

I like the premise of this book. It reads very similar to The Bell Jar, in that it's all first person, and the reader is aware that as crazy as everything sounds, it also all makes perfect sense.

This book also reads like a memoir, even though it's fiction. Once I realized this, it made the book easier to read and figure out. 

Rowan is a good, complex character. I appreciate that, even though as she's searching for herself, she seems to come to conclusions rather abruptly. I feel like this would have made a better series, rather than a standalone book. She states how she thinks her mom feels about things, then states things like, "Mom wouldn't know for years that...." This feels abrupt as well. 

This book jumps all over the place. At points, I couldn't tell if we were reading about 5 year old Rowan, or 24 year old Rowan, or college Rowan. At one point, Rowan is in kindergarten, and suddenly jumps to High School, with no buffer. This made the book rather confusing. 

All in all, this book is good, but feels like it needs some further editing, to make the jumps between Rowan's ages a little more cohesive. She's a very good character; I found myself relating to her quite well in many different situations. I just wish the book read more like fiction, instead of a 16 year old's diary.

The Rating

I give this book 3 stars out of 5. I found the Rowan character believable and relatable, but the book felt stunted, and not very cohesive. It is worth reading once, but I probably won't read it again. I would like to see the Rowan character in another book about later in her life; after she grows up a bit.

Conclusion

I didn't like this book, but I also didn't hate it. Inconvenient Daughter had some really great parts, but had other parts that diminished the whole. I couldn't give this book a full 5 stars, but couldn't give it 1 either. For me, this book was average, and worth reading once. Unfortunately, I don't see myself reading it again.

24-year-old Rowan Kelly is in the ER after a traumatic sexual encounter. From there, Rowan jumps back and forth through her life: her adoption from Korea, her childhood and teen years with white parents and a Korean brother on Long Island, and her Catholic school experiences. She also hints at her desperate desire to know why "BioMom" abandoned her, her troubled relationship with her mother, and her pattern of terrible romantic and sexual relationships. For the first half or so, Rowan's narration is a bit confusing and her purpose is unclear. She picks up narrative strength as she deep-dives into the events, thoughts, and feelings of an abusive relationship in college, and its connection to her self-talk and desperation for love from her mothers. Her later relationships and the crisis in the ER lead to a quick overview of the next ten years or so and the resolution of her status as a daughter.

How life can go entirely wrong - and the roots and misunderstandings that underpin it. A story of family, relationships, and understanding yourself.

I received this book as an ARC from Netgalley.com.

This novel tells the story of Rowan, a woman adopted by a White couple from Korea as a baby. The novel deals with Rowan’s struggle to come to terms with her feelings of not being good enough — not for her biomom who gave her up, not for the adopted mother who wanted to conceive a biological child, and not for the different men who have moved in and out of her life. The story is inspired by Lauren Sharkley’s own experience being transracially adopted, which undoubtedly contributes to how powerfully and devastatingly Rowan’s experience is portrayed. Sharkley brilliantly captures the complexity of mother-daughter relationships. The relationship between Rowan and her mother speaks to the experiences of many women, adopted or not, but provides the specific point of view of an Asian girl adopted into a White family, that many readers have not experienced nor have read about before.

The first person narrative makes the book a quick read and keeps the reader’s engagement high. It also allows the reader to get attached to Rowan’s emotions and makes it easy to see things through her eyes. I had a strong emotional connection to Rowan and her story.

I liked how the novel was arranged, traveling back and forth through periods of Rowan’s life. It captured the ways in which each of Rowan’s choices was connected to what had happened to her previously. However, it was not perfectly executed. It was sometimes difficult to situate moments into Rowan’s history. There were also some moments that were repeated without offering anything to expand on them. One other issue was that some little details did not seem to fit into the narrative and I wondered if these were real events that Sharkely wanted to include. Further, some events were glossed over although they were made to be prominent in the lead up to them. Fleshing out some of these areas would have made the novel stronger.

I was disappointed in the ending. For a novel that seemed so real throughout, I thought the ending seemed unrealistic. The ending felt rushed, and I wanted more.

Overall, this book was a solid 3 for me. However, it is a quick read and I recommend it for those who want insight into being adopted transracially or the complex dynamics of mother-daughter relationships generally.