Cover Image: Love-Centered Parenting

Love-Centered Parenting

Pub Date:   |   Archive Date:

Member Reviews

I am so fortunate to be on the launch team for this book -- it has affected me so much! In a good way! I had to stop several times while reading to take notes, so many of Crystal's words stopped me in my tracks. Especially this passage, "Instead, I heard myself utter some unexpected words, "You may not feel like you're beautiful right now, but the truth is that you are. I want you to know, you are welcome to voice how you're feeling (as in, 'I feel ugly') at any time. But I don't want you to make negative 'I am" statements about yourself, because they are actually lies, and we don't allow lying in our home".

I read that passage and just cried. I have a young daughter at home and she has already started the negative "I am" statements. I am SO thankful to Crystal for putting this book out there for all of us. I was hooked during the introduction. Her writing style is professional, but so easy to read and follow. She is thought-provoking and challenging, while also calming. It's a wonderful balance.

*Disclaimer: I am not Christian as the author is. There are Christian themes throughout the book, but I did not feel overwhelmed by them at all. If you are on the fence about reading because you are not aligned spiritually with the author, I encourage you to still give it a chance

Was this review helpful?

Love-Centered Parenting by Crystal Paine is a great, great book for all parents. It is wonderful to read a parenting book that is focused on God's love and everything else comes from it -- as I find that is the most important thing. But in her book, Crystal Paine looks at what really matters: how you are as a parent, and how that affects your children. We can set all the rules we want but those likely do not make the change we would like to see in our children. All in all, this is a great book and I highly recommend this to all parents.

Was this review helpful?

Crystal Paine (the Money Saving Mom of blog fame) is coming out with a new parenting book. I received a copy in advance and promised to write an honest review.

I've now raised 7 children into adulthood and was very interested in finding out more about Crystal’s approach to raising her kids. I found all the parenting advice to be spot on and it closely reflected my own parenting journey. This is not a "how to change your children and make them behave" book. Nope. It's about how YOU as a parent can change YOUR heart and YOUR approach and forge a stronger, more positive relationship with your children. By doing that, the entire family benefits. And the approach works.

Crystal shares a lot of personal stories about her journey as a parent, and she does so while protecting the privacy of her children. This openness and honesty with her failures and successes will help other parents. For this alone, many will value her book.

This book is directed to evangelical Christian parents - and I'll be honest that is not me. I am not at all religious, although I grew up in the Episcopal Church. I do read Christian authored books (i.e. Jen Hatmaker), and often get good bits of wisdom from them after I filter out the religious references. So my question was - is this a book that will cross-over to the non-Christian audience? Unfortunately, it's not. The parenting advice is solid and spot-on, but this book is 100% written for Christians and in my opinion those with evangelical leanings. For me, the book was still excellent, but a non-religious reader would need to apply a filter to a good bit of the text.

So why a 4-star rating? Well, the book is written by a Christian, for Christians and published by a Christian publisher. For the targeted audience, this is a 100% fantastic book. I review books hoping to give potential readers insight about a book and whether it’s a fit for them.

Crystal comes from a legalist (I had to look that term up, that's how much I don't know) background and I think her message and the personal journey will resonate with others moving away from that perspective. I do wish the cover made it more apparent that this is a Christian book. My only other peeve is that the book subtitle talks about launching children, but by design, it's really about raising younger children. Crystal still needs to launch her children, and I look forward to that book as well.

So - If you are a Christian and looking for some excellent heartfelt and heart-led parenting advice, this is the book you need.

Was this review helpful?

Read this practical and super helpful book. Filled with first rate and first hand experience, Crystal Paine has answers and encouragement for the young mom and her family. Paine is forthright and on target with her ideas for managing time, expectations, and just general discipline. What works for her will probably work for you. Filled with examples and helpful structures and charts, this is a valuable source and would make a great gift. Perfect for the church or school library as foundational family leadership. Highest recommendation. Wisdom for now.

Was this review helpful?

Excellent book with a different perspective on parenting. “The most impactful way you can help your kids understand God’s love is for them to see it lived out in your life on a daily basis.”
We need to be willing and able to admit our mistakes and be honest with our kids, leading by example. This book is an incredible resource to help you let go of the mom guilt and realize that you have little control over your children’s life choices and destination. “Love them like Jesus loves them. Live as loved.”

Was this review helpful?

Happy book mail and release day! I was sent an advanced copy of Love Centered Parenting from @themoneysavingmom and absolutely loved it! I have been following Crystal for years and really enjoy her down to earth, say it like it is, attitude. She is real and raw in this book and she shared stories (with permission) from her own parenting journey. This book has a lot more Christianity than Crystal’s other books and it was refreshing! I loved it!
.
I think my absolute favorite take away is this: I don’t need to be perfect all I need to do is love my kids as God would love them. Sometimes that’s easier said than done...but love helps fix all. Swipe through to see some of my favorite parts.
.
Have you read any of Crystal’s other books? If not give this one a try! I loved it and found such honest good truth in it.
.
#bookreview #lovecenteredparenting #bookstagram #nonfiction #momlife

Was this review helpful?

Love Centered Parenting is a book I wanted to read ever since I saw Crystal Paine’s post on Instagram. She is a lovely woman of God who is honest and open about her life as a parent and wife. This book literally grabbed my attention from the first couple of sentences in the first chapter. Crystal has a way of drawing her readers attention but not only that but also giving them an opportunity to understand how to apply what she is saying to their own lives. Being a mom of a teenager and a 10 year old, her thoughts about loving our children through the difficult times has helped change my perspective in how I talk to my children and parent them. This book is not about how to raise great kids who are completely obedient and never make mistakes. Crystal instead reminds us to live truth and not speak lies. Starting first with the parent, searching and uprooting lies that we believe about ourselves that are contrary to who God says we are also thinking about our kids and reminding them as well to speak the truth. Ultimately our goal in doing this is to point our children to Jesus and the gospel. Thank you NetGalley for the opportunity to read this insightful book.

Was this review helpful?

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Bethany House Publishers for my copy of Love-Centered Parenting by Crystal Paine in exchange for an honest review. It published March 16, 2021.
I've been following Crystal's blog for years, so this book has been long-awaited, and highly-anticipated for me! And boy did it deliver! I love her voice and how she is walking out parenting alongside you, and regularly acknowledges that she's imperfect, rather than seeming holier than thou.
There are so many inspiring concepts in here, and so many practical things to put into place. I will definitely be trying to follow along this book, and definitely be buying this as a gift for loved-ones!

Was this review helpful?

As a new mom I know that parenting can be an overwhelming change in life. I want to be able to do it from a place of love and not from a place of frustration and this book is such a good guide for how to get there. It’s not your typical parenting advice book, it’s like sitting down with a friend and the way Crystal shares her own experiences is so very relatable and hopegiving.

Was this review helpful?

Hope for disheartened parents! Love-Centered Parenting is a book to add to your parenting toolbox ASAP! It offers a unique perspective on parenting as Crystal shares her journey through various parenting struggles. If your current style of parenting is leaving you frustrated and exhausted, this book is worth a read! The first part of the book has you step back and reflect first before offering practical applications. 

This book is parents of kids age 12 and under, but those with teenagers can still find value. If you work closely with parents or children, this would also be an excellent book for you, too. 

Thank you Bethany House and NetGalley for this advance reader copy in exchange for my honest review.

Was this review helpful?

I received a copy of this book in advance. This is an honest review and all opinions are my own.

I have followed Crystal Paine’s blog and social media for years, so I was super excited when she announced that she was writing a parenting book. I’m not a religious person, and even though Love Centered Parenting is Christian based, I figured there would be things I could take away from the book to help me parent better. I was right. While the theme of God is spread throughout the book, along with numerous references to bible verses and Crystal’s faith, her ideas can be used by people of any religious persuasion, or none at all. I love that the focus is how we as parents can change our behavior to love our children well, encouraging them to grow into themselves, rather than molding our children into how we think they should be.

Not only does Crystal include deeply personal stories about her family, but this book contains wisdom such as:
“Our kids don’t need our productivity. They need our presence.”
“Ultimately, I’m not in control of my kids’ lives and decisions.”

EXCELLENT BOOK!

Was this review helpful?

This is a book that I wish had been available ten years ago when I started my parenting journey. Crystal does a great job of reminding us how much Christ loves us and how that should come through in our parenting. I am recommending this book to all my friends that have children!

Was this review helpful?

This book has taken all of my random thoughts about parenting and boiled it down so anyone can read it. It really is a great resource for all types of parents. Whether you are the parent with no idea of where to start or the parent who has been doing this for a while but needs a tweak, this book is for you. Love Centered Parenting is amazing, and my new go-to baby shower gift.

This book starts with working on yourself, the parent before you can help your child. The building blocks of Love Centered Parenting are the ideas of self-love, love from God, and trust in the atonement of Jesus. Crystal is a Christian and allows her beliefs to permeate everything in her life. I love her insights into different passages in the bible and how they apply to the world of parenting.

The four steps she goes over in Love Centered Parenting are 1) Lean In and Love, 2) Listen Well, 3) Lead with Humility, and 4) Let Go. These may seem simple, but I love how she devotes time to each one showing what happens when it's working or not. Crystal gives many examples of showing love to our children, stoping to actually listen, leading, and ultimately, letting go.

I really enjoyed this book and recommend it to all!

Was this review helpful?

Love-Centered Parenting is not your usual parenting book. This book isn't 5 steps to implement to improve your children or a "how to" or "what to do '' list. Rather Crystal causes you to stop and think about yourself as a parent - how you as a parent can change, what your heart is like and what your approach could be, to forge a stronger positive relationship with your children. Love-Centered Parenting is about getting to the root of how you think, act and do as a parent. Through immense vulnerability Crystal shares how even though she walks with God and her family holds strong to their faith, as Christians, they are not immune to challenges and tribulations. Crystal is relatable, practical and empathetic to how hard parenting can be. Love-Centered Parenting is useful for parents of all stages! Crystal has written a guide that motivates parents to parent and raise their children through the grace and love of God by releasing the burdens and pressures so often associated with parenting. A must read for not yet parents and soon to be empty nesters.

Was this review helpful?

I have never highlighted a book more than Crystal Paine’s Love Centered Parenting. Crystal is honest and transparent with her struggles and mistakes and many thanks to her kids for allowing her to tell their stories. It can feel very lonely when we are stuck in our own little worlds, especially during pandemic days, and I have definitely felt like the worst parent and that all the other families out there are perfect and what is wrong with me?! Why can’t my kids be the kind of amazing we see on social media? We all want to love our kids and see them become incredible adults, and this book has the tools and the inspiration that will make that goal a little easier.

Filled with stories and examples of what Crystal is learning through her own parenting, she gives practical advice that you can implement today. It starts with how we see ourselves. That we can’t live the love-centered parenting approach if we don’t believe that we ourselves are loved by God. After we start to live loved, we are able to lean in and love our kids even when we’d rather lash out and start lecturing. We can listen well and actually pay attention to what our kids are saying and get to their hearts. We can lead with humility, admitting when we are wrong and teaching our kids to do the same. Then we can learn to let go and allow our kids to make mistakes and learn from them since the goal is to raise adults.

Crystal also includes memory verses, conversation starters, and many more helps in the back of the book which are practical and helpful.

I cannot recommend this book more highly. I have enjoyed Crystal’s books, email newsletters, and podcasts for years, and this book will definitely be a reread and a frequent reference as I go through my days. I’m already daily reminding myself to Live Loved, Lean in and Love, and Listen Well. You will not be disappointed.
I received a complimentary copy of this book for an honest review. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.

Was this review helpful?

This is a parenting book that focuses on the parent's behavior rather than how to handle your child's behavior. And for that reason, it truly is a gold mine. The author's perspective is that she needs Jesus and a solid, growing relationship with Him, with her identity set on who she is in Him, in order to parent well.

So why did I give it four stars? I'm not sure the best audience for this book on parenting. I wasn't the best audience which is what clouds my judgment I suspect because my youngest is 11 and my oldest is 19. I wasn't the best audience because I relearned how to parent over a decade ago.

My real wonder about fit is that Crystal's starting point of change rests in her own view of herself, her insecurity, and her recognition that she was believing lies about herself and that was making her parenting motivation about her, not about her children's growth. Not all will relate to her anxiety, fear, and insecurity, so that's what gives me pause in the book recommendation. My fear would be that people who don't connect with her weakness and discoveries might miss the conclusions that it brought her to, and that ALL believers should keep in mind as they parent a newborn or an adult child.

That being said, I've tried to read new parenting books that are different, highly recommended, and faith-based once or twice a year, because parenting is one aspect of life where failure is consistent, yet I learn and grow, but I always have more to learn, and I always need more perspective, focus, and reminders of how to think about the heart, and approach others in love, and not react out of my own emotions. I enjoyed the book a lot. I read it in days which isn't something that I often have done in this past year. I learned. I grew. I am reminded, humbled, and it was a good book for me.

So as I'm not fully sure the best people to read this book, I can share things to note before choosing this book:

*This book is an encouragement to parent out of your love for the Lord Jesus, His love for you that really fuels your life, and your trust in the Holy Spirit.

*half of the book shared Crystal's stories and self-discovery when she hit rock bottom in her parenting journey and realized she had been parenting out of fear, not faith, that she's been worried about how her children made her look, not how their behavior showed their hearts.

So it's her process and discovery that to parent out of love- you need to have an identity in Christ. A secure developed, humble, daily even second by second faith and interaction with the Holy Spirit. (this is the part of the book that many will clearly appreciate and benefit from.)

*the second half of the book is strategies to keep in mind for leading with love and leaning in to love first. These are vital, important truths. Our love comes from God. From the heavenly Father, and He helps us give our children what they need to launch into life. This vital message is clear, talks through failures and successes that Crystal Paine has processed in her parenting experience, and gives a great perspective for parents to process, remember, and tattoo into their mindset.

I've said since I became a mom to one child-- parenting is the most sanctifying experience of my life and faith- and as the parent of a 19, 15, 11-year-olds, as well as four-plus years pouring into another child from ages 5-10, it still is!!

I suspect that my discovery of being sure I parented this way started a few years before Crystal's when I re-learned how to parent a child from a hard place who spent over 4 years in our home as our child. Only Love Today by Rachel Macy Stafford reminds me of some of the thoughts shared in the book. Connected parenting by Karyn Purvis was the first clear model. Connect first then redirect was a mantra I learned. Time-In, not time-out. Find the why behind the behavior. Perspectives I've been following almost a decade.

I sought out this book to review after a conversation with a group of friends about the subtitle of the book. We all liked Love Centered Parenting. But the subtitle of "a no-fail guide to launching your kids" was a stumbling block for many. Nothing in life is no-fail. But having followed Crystal's blog for well over 10 years, maybe 15? I didn't think she would allow this to be a subtitle that didn't fit the book.

I even asked her on Instagram what she meant by it. Here's what she said: "well, I’d need a whole book to clearly explain that! 😉 But, the premise of the book is that walking with your kids and loving them well — as I outline in the book — isn’t ultimately about their choices and decisions or how they turn out, but about pouring into them with the love we have been given by God. It’s about leaning in and loving, listening well, leading with humility, and letting go. ❤️"

Well having read the book, I get it better. I'm not sure I would have chosen those words but I will say that the book is more about how the parent acts in order to launch kids into adult life. And since ultimately in parenting, I can only control myself in a healthy way, and I need to parent with the intention that I am parenting people who will be adults out in the world without me, and I would really love it if they were also people that I truly enjoy, want to spend time with, and who love and want to stay involved in my life, beyond the years they live in my home.

One of my favorite discoveries the author mentions is: as parents, we are NOT parenting for first-time obedience as our main parenting goal. I've felt this way for a long time, but haven't been able to articulate my reasoning as she does. I like parenting as a relationship, not for rules.

I love how she ends the chapters with key thoughts/points. I love the authors she has chosen to quote and her quotes are some of my favorite perspectives. I love her heart and fully agree with her strategies and perspective. So I suppose for me maybe this book is a five-star book. I'll think about this.

Thankful to Netgalley, Baker books, and Bethany House Publishing for the opportunity to read an advance copy of this book and review it. Go pre-order it-- I can suggest that you buy it or have your library order it!

Was this review helpful?

“It’s my story of letting go of control and manipulation and parenting for my reputation, and relearning to parent from a place of love and grace.”

Parenting is not easy. There are so many parenting books out there that give advice on what to do and say (or not do and say), but not many address the heart and attitude of a parent. Love-Centered Parenting does focus on having parents take a hard look at their own motivations and encourages them to both evaluate they lies they believe about themselves and then replace them with the truth of being loved by God. Then parents can find a way to lean in and love their children well.

I am part of the launch team for Love-Centered Parenting. I was given an advanced copy of the book in exchange for a fair review. I have followed Crystal Paine for many years and have loved her advice on ways to save money and tips for blogging. Recently, I started listening to the podcast she has with her husband and enjoy how real they are and open to sharing their lives.

Love-Centered Parenting is a faith-based book about the heart of a parent. Crystal shares many stories of both successes and failures from her time as a mother so far. She opens by sharing that one of their children was suicidal at one point. There were called into the principal’s office to find out their child had been bullying other children and acting out inappropriately. No teachers or other parents had told them what was going on. They ended up having to take the child to the ER before they got the help and counseling they needed. This was a wake-up call for them as parents and Crystal shares from her heart so other parents can learn the lesson she did without having to hit rock-bottom in parenting.

The goal in parenting should be to love our children well, not base our reputation on what they do or define being a good parent by a child’s actions. The only way to do this is to base parenting decisions on love, according to Crystal. I would recommend this book to every parent and parent-to-be out there – or to anyone who takes care of children. While she says Love-Centered Parenting is geared with advice to parents of young children since she is still in the midst of parenting teens, I feel her advice works very well for being a parent of teens.

Was this review helpful?

I have followed Crystal Paine on social media for several years and am a fan of hers, so I enjoyed her newest book. I was already familiar with a lot of her story and parenting techniques that she uses, so as a result, there was not a lot of new information for me in the book. It included a lot of rehashing from her blog and Instagram, but someone who is not familiar with her from social media would probably find the book less repetitive. It is written from a Christian perspective, but I think it also has some valuable information for secular parents as well. The author is very positive and encouraging and I found the book to have a lot of good ideas for remembering that loving your kids is the most important part of parenting.

Was this review helpful?

Highlights:
You can’t give what you don’t have. You can’t love your kids well if you don’t believe you are fully loved yourself.”

“Our kids don’t need our productivity. They need our presence.”

“Outward performance is not necessarily a direct indication of inward change. Strict rules and rigidity will never save a child, a preteen, a teen, or even an adult. They might prevent someone from consequences at times, but they will never change someone’s heart.“

Was this review helpful?

I have followed Crystal Paine for many years through her blog and social media. Her latest book Love-Centered Parenting shows her at her most vulnerable and how life circumstances can flip a parenting journey in an instant.

Her writing style is very conversational and the book is easy to read while still driving home the points that she is making.

During this time of lock downs and staying at home, Love-Centered Parenting shows us how to parent from a place of love and contentment vs stress and frustration.

Love-Centered Parenting will be a welcome addition to many parents bookshelves no matter what age children they have

Was this review helpful?