A great and maybe even necessary read for white folks, especially those who are still coming to grips with the way that their skin color has affected their daily lives.

19 letters that are written to his white friend, and is a must read for anyone wanting or claiming to be an ally or accomplice to the black community. A very straight forward and will cause you to think and question things.

I received a copy of the book via NetGalley and am voluntarily leaving an honest review.

An honest and open-minded observation of the current state of race relations. Gravely goes out of his way to avoid being fully confrontational and instead invites the reader to understand how life may be seen by those having grown up with visible differences, primarily regarding race. He invites collaboration and cooperation in moving forward and encourages conversation in all future events.

I requested this book because I think it's important to have these types of discussions in our social climate today. I'm eager to know what I can do, as a white woman, to advance these dialogues and truly move past a long history of racism in our country that unfortunately, still exists today.
Dr. Gravely opens his book by stating he doesn't believe the reader is racist. I think that was important for any reader of this book to immediately let their guards down so they will be able to not only "read" what he's saying but sincerely contemplate his ideas and determine what their own prejudices or privileges are so we can advance a more inclusive community around us.
I do believe it was important for the author to state we need to start within ourselves. While one may automatically believe they harbor no racist motives, prejudices or privileges, those are exactly the type of cognitive dissonances that tend to harbor any positive movement toward ending racism. Dr. Gravely does not ever make the reader feel demeaned but there are times where the discussion is uncomfortable. However, this makes you truly think about what he's saying.
The writing style is not stuffy, or preaching in any way. Dr. Graves writes as if he's sitting in a chair across from you having a discussion about what it means to be a black member of society. He gives examples and personal anecdotes to punctuate his points. One of his examples, where he was stopped in a hospital with his then-girlfriend, who was a doctor, was heart-breaking. While these examples are sensitive there are also compassionate questions like "How can we trust one another?" and clear examples of how we can contribute to helping end racism in our country.

I think this book does an excellent job of trying to explain the experience of racism to white people, and the ways we can and need to do better. I found the “my friend” and “dear friend” somewhat patronizing, particularly given it’s repetitive use throughout the book, but I also understand the author used it to clarify his tone in a subject that is often heated and which white people typically jump on the defensive about.

Dr Gravely speaks directly to his fellow citizens in this book about the persistent racial inequalities that continue to exist today. I do recommend that you read this book based solely on the clear passion that is entrenched in the words. Whilst the writing is occasionally dense - which makes its accessibility questionable - Dr Gravely makes strides to reach all types of readers.

Dear White Friends, from one white person to another, please read this book. Mr. Gravely calmly and politely (sometimes perhaps too polite but he is trying to give you, his friend, the benefit of the doubt) explains racism, the causes, the results, why it needs to change, and how my dear friend you can help change the system. The entire book felt like a collection of coffee date conversations between two friends, providing well needed education. The tone of the book can be summed up in this quote from the first letter: "your potential discomfort can no longer be the reason we don't talk about race." This book is great for someone who is just coming to the realization that there is something really wrong with the treatment of minorities in this country. The first two thirds of the letters are a gentle hand holding as the facts are laid out. Much of this will be repetitive for those who have been educating themselves already. But, unlike many of the books I have already read, this is one of the few that offered suggestions for things that most everyone is in a position to do. Practical suggestions. This book would be an excellent choice for book clubs who want a basis for an introduction to systemic racism and equity and find empowerment.

A good, accessible first book for whites wanting to learn more about social justice as it applies to racism in the US.