Copy of my review from GoodReads

"This would be an excellent book for anyone who wants to learn how to make better decisions - as a person, and not just as a manager.

What makes the book so good?

1. The writing style is clear and straight to the point. This is probably the result of very careful editing (on top of good writing skills from the authors). It makes "Distancing" very easy to read.

2. All the points mentioned in the book are illustrated with striking real life examples. A large number of industries and cultures are leveraged to show that the method is universal and would work across cultures and industries. You will read a great deal of anecdotes about nuclear submarines (the specialty of one of the authors), but also acting, sports, chip manufacturing... This makes for an entertaining read.

3. All the points are backed with academic research. One of the authors is a psychology researcher, and it shows. On top of referencing widely available books, the authors are also diving into research articles, state of the art knowledge in cognitive science, and so on. Too many self-help books are not evidence based. "Distancing" is not one of them. You will find all the references neatly arranged in the notes at the end.

4. The presented method is immediately actionable. You do not need a lot of time. You do not need to attend expensive workshops. You do not need to be a manager. There are even exercises in the book that you can try right away (I suggest you pause your reading and do them, without waiting for the right moment).

5. This is a rather short book. You can make the time and read it, even if you are not a voracious reader. Don't get me wrong, I have no issues with reading 1000+ pages doorstoppers myself. But this is the kind of "short, sweet, efficient" book that I would happily gift to my reports at work. High value, low time investment!

Thank you #NetGalley and Portfolio / Penguin for the ARC."

Distancing offers a fresh take on how leaders can gain clarity and improve decision-making by stepping back—emotionally, psychologically, and even temporally—from high-stress situations. The book presents several methods of “distancing,” each designed to help leaders avoid reactive choices and stay aligned with long-term goals.

My favorite and most impactful section was on distancing by time, which invites readers to imagine how their future selves would approach a challenge. This practical tool helped me re-frame immediate stressors and think more strategically. It’s a technique I can see myself returning to often in both personal and professional contexts.

Overall, Distancing is a thoughtful and accessible read for leaders navigating complexity. Its tools are applicable across a range of roles and situations, and it’s especially valuable for those committed to showing up with intention, even under pressure.

Timely, thoughtful, and empowering book that delivers a powerful message: to make wiser decisions, we must learn to step outside ourselves. Written by leadership expert and former U.S. Navy Captain David Marquet, alongside psychologist Michael Gillespie, this book artfully blends neuroscience, behavioral psychology, and leadership insight to present a simple yet transformative idea—become your own coach through psychological distancing.
From the start, Marquet and Gillespie challenge the often-repeated mantra to “be fully present.” Instead, they advocate for a counterintuitive yet deeply impactful approach: distancing ourselves from the emotional immediacy of the moment to gain objectivity and clarity. Through three core strategies—self-distancing, spatial distancing, and temporal distancing—the authors guide readers to view their decisions through a wiser, broader lens. Each technique is made practical with well-researched examples, from everyday life choices to high-stakes business decisions.
The authors turn complex cognitive science into actionable tools, supported by real-life cases and reflection exercises that invite readers to apply the ideas immediately. Whether you're a leader navigating team dynamics, a professional facing career crossroads, or simply someone aiming to reduce daily anxiety, this book offers grounded, empowering strategies for clear and courageous thinking. Ultimately, it’s a guide to becoming more self-aware, less reactive, and more intentional in every area of life.

A worthwhile self-help/leadership book touting the practice of taking a step back from situations before analyzing or reacting. A strategy that applies to business and personal lives equally.

Excellent book for personal and professional development. I learnt a lot. It was very well written with lots of examples from different walks of life. Highly recommended. Thank you to the author. Thank you to #netgalley and the publisher for an ARC.