Stay with Me

This is a brilliant piece of work!  The story follows a married couple in Nigeria who for some reason can't have children and the story begins there.  As soon as I started reading about Akin and Yejide Ajayi, I was sucked in.  Because of the dual perspectives, I was experiencing their struggles and heartbreak of not being able to have children with them.  

The story depicts the things we do for the people we love and how it changes us.  I'm literally having a hard time trying to say all the things I want to say, because this book blew me away.  I can see why it was shortlisted for the Bailey's Prize.  

This is a 5 star read for me.  I highly recommend this book to anyone.  The storytelling was intricately woven, it kept my interest with the hidden gems that popped into the story at the right time, and the characters were phenomenal. Read it, please!  You will not regret it!

At the risk of sounding cliche, Adebayo is truly a "stunning new voice in fiction." This novel is told from dual perspectives, and Adebayo achieves the rare feat of making each voice just as powerful, nuanced and sympathetic as the other. Readers should be prepared to accompany these characters to the very highest of highs and lowest of lows on their journey of marriage and parenting. The setting of late 20th-century Nigeria introduces a specific set of cultural norms and traditions that add an additional layer to the novel, and despite the emotional roller coaster this book will take you on, you won't want it to end.

compulsive little read that I read in one sitting. Was drawn to the book mainly by its nominations for the Baileys Women's Prize for Fiction and I was not disappointed. The premise of the novel drew me in and had me hooked right to the last page. 

There was great characterisation throughout this novel and Ayobami Adebayo has a way of writing characters that as a reader you shouldn't like but you find yourself wanting these characters to succeed. 

Plot was present throughout the book and kept taking turns that I didn't see coming and great plot always hooks me as a reader. 

Was a lovable little book that brought a tear to my eye in the last chapter from a very talented writer and I look forward to reading more work from the author.

Stay With Me is was an amazing and tragic story about how obsession and lies can destroy a marriage.  All Yejide wants is a child.  She is desperate but content to keep trying until her husband Akin's family convince him to take a second wife.  Then it becomes an obsession.  Akin loves Yejide and never means to hurt her, but seeing how deep her obsession goes convinces him he must take desperate action.

I loved that we got to see the story from both the husband's and wife's side (and Adebayo did a great job fleshing out each of their unique perspectives). While they both made mistakes, they were trying to do the best they could.  Some of their worst mistakes were made out of fear, and even though it doesn't make anything excusable or forgivable, it does make it human.  So many of our worst decisions are made out of fear.

The main plot of desperately trying to conceive made me reflect on how women were and still are viewed in society today.  Why is motherhood considered the main and most important identity for women?  Is it possible to have a happy life without children?  Even though Yejide desperately wanted a child herself, a lot of her anguish was caused by the expectations and judgement of her husband's family who viewed a childless wife as less than a woman.  Her mother-in-law did talk about the strength of women, but that strength is a direct result of their role as mothers.  

Both Yejide and Akin go through unthinkable loss throughout the story, and they have to decide whether to not their marriage can survive.  The main events take place in the late 1980's in Nigeria, but the story itself is timeless.  Even though it was a depressing read, the ending gave us a bit of hope.

I highly recommend this book to anyone interested in examining the complexities of marriage, motherhood, and loss.

In sparse but always engaging prose, this wonderful debut hooks you right at the beginning, and it never lets you go until the final page. Yejide is dying to get pregnant and in the four years she has been married to Akin, they have been unsuccessful in making it happen. As Yourubas in Nigerian the pressure to have children is great. The pressure on Yejide coming from Akin's family borders on extreme. So, the first of many unwraps comes early in the novel. Akin at the urging of his mother takes on a second wife, despite the fact that Akin and Yejide eschewed the practice of polygamy, vowing not to make it apart of their union. 

So Ms. Adebayo has put the reader front and center into the marriage of Akin and Yejide which is in full crumble mode. The novel starts in the present time of 2008 then, she takes us back to their initial meeting and works back to the present to show how we got to a collapsed marriage. She uses Akin and Yejide as alternate narrators to give the readers a balanced look as how the perspective of the marriage failing looks from each party. The heart of this novel clearly is love, and how it looks from various perspectives. As Adebayo works through the various themes in the novel and offers up timely reveals, you will be onboard as an emotionally invested reader supporting Adebayo while trying to wrap your head around Akin's solutions to having children. Adebayo is very convincing in her narrative and storytelling, making the reader a believer and fan page after page. I want to tell you some more about the trials of their marriage but to do so would ruin the pleasant pop-ups that come from reading a great novel. This one will be on 2017 best books of the year. At turns funny, gut wrenching, sobering and thoughtful. A home run. Thanks to Netgalley for providing an advanced ebook in exchange for a fair and honest review. Book publishes on 8/22/2017.

Absolutely wonderful. This debut is like Fates and Furies in that it explores the lies, misunderstandings, and assumptions that affect a couple’s marriage, but Yejide and Akin are depicted in a gentler, more compassionate fashion. The issue of infertility particularly makes this book ideal for discussions.

Desperate to have a child, hopefully a son, a young Nigerian couple struggle to meet the expectations of family and society. The story reflects a culture in which a woman's role is seen as bearing a child for her husband in a society where multiple wives are acceptable, especially if the first wife has not had a child. A society where a mechanic  or a doctor would prefer to speak to the husband rather than the wife, where family members have a good deal of influence in this couple's relationship. The struggle is compounded by the lengths to which Akin and Yejide go to and the desperation is reflected in some things that they do that made me not like either of them very much.

There were some twists that I wasn't expecting - maybe too many. I kept wondering what else can happen. Too many things - curves in the plot line , too many secrets. Maybe meant to depict the desperation, but for me they diluted some of broader themes that I at first thought were the substance of the book. It definitely is a learning experience shedding light on the volatile political situation of the times , the culture, the place of women, the importance of a son, of children in this society. While I loved the ending, overall the book is 3 stars for me. A good effort for a debut novel and I will watch for what Adebayo does in the future. 


I received an advanced copy of this book from Knopf Doubleday through NetGalley.

When I heard that this was shortlisted for the Baileys Women’s Prize for Fiction, I was really excited about it and reading the synopsis just made me know that this will be one of my favourite reads of 2017. This book is no simple book. It’s an adventure!

I don’t exactly know how to talk about this book without getting into any spoilers but I’m going to try to. This book is packed with twists! Like, as soon as you start to move on from something, something else comes to surprise you even more.

Infertility is a global health issue. Although a lot of people are ashamed to bring it up, it is there and a lot of people are trying real hard to conceive a child. In this book,  the main characters are fighting the same battle. Only their families were also involved in this battle by pressuring Akin, the husband, to take on a second wife that will be able to give them the grandchild they’ve all been waiting for. This is something that has angered me SO BAD. I absolutely hate it when parents are trying to get in their son’s or daughter’s marriage and try to destroy it. It’s something that I’ve seen both in fiction and in real life and it just angers me. Besides, it’s not like Yejide (the wife) didn’t want children and didn’t do anything about it! She was really trying so hard on her side as well. She still ended up being forced to accept Akin’s second wife. And that’s the point where mistakes  and really bad things started to happen. It’s also where I got so invested into the story in a way that made me read that second part of the book in one sitting.

The book being quite short, the writing had to be very simple and straight to the point because although the book was short, it contained so much. It wasn’t too simple in a way that will make you feel that it was bland. On the contrary! It has a very nice flow to it and it won’t leave you be uninterested by the characters and what’s happening. I also loved the fact that we were able to get Akin’s version of the story and Yejide’s too. Both characters are flawed, they both made mistakes and I really hated one of the characters at first but then my point of view changed completely after hearing them out. And since there were so many twists, I just kept needing more and more. I was never able to predict what was going to happen next and it’s exactly what I’m usually looking for in books. Although, to be honest, I wasn’t expecting this multiple-twists thing to be in a literary fiction novel that talked about a marriage that was on the brink of getting destroyed.

I think that aside from all the twists, what really kept me invested in the story was that the characters felt real. I was taken in a Nigerian home and got to know about their day to day lives. I liked googling all the food and the historical events (to check if they’re true or fictional, that’s something I do with all books) in there and I specifically liked the sound of Moin-Moin which I kept repeating for a week. Throughout this book we also get to learn about the military coup that happened during 1985 led by the Major Babangida. I loved how this book took me to Nigeria and made me learn a bit about its food and its history. I didn’t know much but clearly Nigeria has fought a lot to shift towards a democratic government. Of course, the book isn’t only focused on that. What was also interesting was also knowing about the Yoruba people and their customs and beliefs. It just made me realize how really diverse our world is and the answer is A LOT. I am looking forward to having similar experiences with other books whose main characters have different backgrounds.

Yejide is a really strong, smart and opinionated woman. She might have made a few mistakes but no one is perfect. She was still my favorite character because she was compassionate and didn’t give up. She has only given up when she shouldn’t have but she still went a long way because while being modern, she couldn’t keep up with all the traditions at first and that was really hard on her. I felt really sad for her relationship with Akin getting weaker and weaker but it couldn’t have gone any other way. I loved their conversations once Yejide realized Akin has taken a second wife. I loved how she kept snapping back at him. It was hilarious!

There were a few flaws but they didn’t take out much from the story and it really depends on preferences. For example, although I really enjoyed all the twists and turns this book has taken, I found it a bit rushed. Perhaps if the book was a bit longer, it would’ve been better. It may also give the impression that it was unrealistic but having heard a few similar stories to this that have happened in real life, I didn’t think twice about this detail. I can’t invalidate someone’s story just because it doesn’t sound realistic to me. Also, at the start of every chapter, we never really know who’s speaking. Whether it was Akin or Yejide and although it gets clearer when we get to know the characters better, I would’ve liked a little notice at the beginning because I didn’t know there were multiple points of view in the book.

All in all, this was an amazing gut wrenching read. I highly recommend it, even more if you’ve read Homegoing and enjoyed it.

Was love enough to help Yejide and Akin weather the storms of life? Perhaps, if they were not subjected to family and societal pressures in Ilesa, Nigeria. Loving couple Yejide and Akin believed in their love, however, the cloud of childlessness weighed heavily on their shoulders after four years of marriage. Akin's mother Moomi, reminded him that as first son, he had the responsibility to leave a child behind upon his death. Moomi told Yejide that if she could not produce a child, she should not be called a woman. Societal standards like these caused both Yejide and Akin to implement strategies to produce the "necessary" child.

Yejide is a motherless child. Her mother died in childbirth giving her life. Her father had four current wives, but none were mothers to her, neglecting her and favoring their own children. Yejide wanted to mother a child that was totally hers. Akin had purchased a hair salon for her where she did hair weaving and hair plaiting. Despite loving her job, she would have given it up in a heartbeat. She was willing to travel to the Mountain of Jaw-Dropping Miracles, participate in fasting and rituals while Prophet Josiah and the faithful chanted and promised a successful pregnancy.

Moomi, Akin's mother decided that since Yejide could not have children, a second wife would be chosen for Akin. Akin installed new wife Funmi in her own apartment with plans to visit her on weekends. When Yejide was informed that a second marriage had taken place, she called her husband "a bloody bastard". Her rebellion took the form of cooking "old" beans when family members came to visit. Akin drove them home and later asked Yejide, "What did you feed them? I had to park by a bush....." on the way home.

Yejide, having no mother, no siblings, felt that Akin would leave her and she would be all alone in the world despite Akin's assurances of love. She needed to have a child before Funmi did to make sure Akin stayed with her.

Akin had secrets of his own. People spending time with him and discussing their business and personal thoughts never realized that he didn't show his hand. He kept to himself. Akin took many business trips to Lagos. Akin's brother, Moomi's "favorite son" Dotun lived there. When Dotun lost his job, he crashed at Akin and Yejide's dwelling in Ilesa. Akin paid Dotun's debts and allowed Dotun to stay until he could get back on his feet.

"Stay with Me" by Ayobami Adebayo was an excellent tome both heartfelt and harrowing. The choices made by the principal characters were drastic and mind-boggling with only occasional silver linings. A page turner and a must read.

Thank you Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group and Net Galley for the opportunity to read and review "Stay with Me".

With rich characters and a plot filled with twists, the author takes your emotions on a journey.  You'll experience joy, anger, sadness, frustration and relief as you travel with the Akin and his wife.  This book is a must read!