How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection
by Charles Duhigg
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Pub Date 20 Feb 2024 | Archive Date 30 Jun 2024
Random House Publishing Group - Random House, Random House
“A winning combination of stories, studies, and guidance that might well transform the worst communicators you know into some of the best.”—Adam Grant, author of Think Again and Hidden Potential
Come inside a jury room as one juror leads a starkly divided room to consensus. Join a young CIA officer as he recruits a reluctant foreign agent. And sit with an accomplished surgeon as he tries, and fails, to convince yet another cancer patient to opt for the less risky course of treatment. In Supercommunicators, Charles Duhigg blends deep research and his trademark storytelling skills to show how we can all learn to identify and leverage the hidden layers that lurk beneath every conversation.
Communication is a superpower and the best communicators understand that whenever we speak, we’re actually participating in one of three conversations: practical (What’s this really about?), emotional (How do we feel?), and social (Who are we?). If you don’t know what kind of conversation you’re having, you’re unlikely to connect.
Supercommunicators know the importance of recognizing—and then matching—each kind of conversation, and how to hear the complex emotions, subtle negotiations, and deeply held beliefs that color so much of what we say and how we listen. Our experiences, our values, our emotional lives—and how we see ourselves, and others—shape every discussion, from who will pick up the kids to how we want to be treated at work. In this book, you will learn why some people are able to make themselves heard, and to hear others, so clearly.
With his storytelling that takes us from the writers’ room of The Big Bang Theory to the couches of leading marriage counselors, Duhigg shows readers how to recognize these three conversations—and teaches us the tips and skills we need to navigate them more successfully.
In the end, he delivers a simple but powerful lesson: With the right tools, we can connect with anyone.
“This is not just a riveting read about how to understand others better. It’s also a revealing look at how to be understood. Charles Duhigg delivers a winning combination of stories, studies, and guidance that might well transform the worst communicators you know into some of the best.”
—Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Think Again and Hidden Potential, and host of the podcast Re:Thinking
"Charles Duhigg does it again, with a book we all need to read. Using his unique mix of stories and science, he gives us Supercommunicators, a guide to better conversation and deeper human connection. If you want to improve your communications skills at work and in life, this book is the place the start."
—Arthur C. Brooks, Professor, Harvard Kennedy School and Harvard Business School, and #1 New York Times bestselling author
"Our personal and professional success depend upon our ability to understand and be understood, and yet, we typically leave this up to intuition. In Supercommunicators, Charles Duhigg goes through a mountain of research — and some riveting stories — and unearths practical tactics to show that anyone can become a more effective listener, speaker, and even social media poster."
–David Epstein, bestselling author of Range and The Sports Gene
"This book stayed with me. I found myself thinking about how many questions I ask and how often I laugh in conversation. Given how much talking we all do, it's amazing how little we understand. A much-needed guide to connecting in disconnected times."
—Amanda Ripley, author of High Conflict