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Description
“A love letter to humanity written by a woman of brilliance and heart.”―Priya Parker
From the bestselling author of Reclaiming Conversation, an urgent warning about how our ever-increasing reliance on AI chatbots is eroding our capacity for the very qualities that make us human.
If social media came for our attention, artificial intelligence is now coming for our capacity for attachment. Chatbots offer themselves as best friends, lovers, and psychotherapists—but when we allow AI to fill these roles, we accept as sufficient its mere performance of intimacy, empathy, and love. We begin to think that pretend empathy is empathy enough. The consequences are profound and troubling: Technology, by offering to do everything, is teaching us that we neither need nor have the capacity to take risks, have hard conversations, struggle through uncertainty and insecurity, or rely on our own faculties and judgment. In the process, it is producing a generation more alienated, depressed, and lonely than ever before.
In Artificial Intimacy, Sherry Turkle—the psychologist who pioneered our understanding of human-computer relationships—draws on vivid stories as well as decades of experience as a chronicler and analyst of digital culture to present an urgent warning about what these “perfect” companions are doing to our minds and relationships. Tracing our new habit of talking to machines through the human lifecycle—from children’s earliest attachments to how we face death—Turkle offers both a cautionary tale and a roadmap for reclaiming our humanity in the age of AI.
“A necessary exploration of what happens when we seek the comforts of connection over the demands of relationships.”―Esther Perel
“[Turkle is] the most qualified member of Team Humanity to call us back to our senses, and to each other.”―Jonathan Haidt
Editor’s Choice by the New York Times Book Review
“A love letter to humanity written by a woman of brilliance and heart.”―Priya Parker
From the bestselling author of Reclaiming Conversation, an urgent warning about how our ever-increasing reliance on...
“A love letter to humanity written by a woman of brilliance and heart.”―Priya Parker
From the bestselling author of Reclaiming Conversation, an urgent warning about how our ever-increasing reliance on AI chatbots is eroding our capacity for the very qualities that make us human.
If social media came for our attention, artificial intelligence is now coming for our capacity for attachment. Chatbots offer themselves as best friends, lovers, and psychotherapists—but when we allow AI to fill these roles, we accept as sufficient its mere performance of intimacy, empathy, and love. We begin to think that pretend empathy is empathy enough. The consequences are profound and troubling: Technology, by offering to do everything, is teaching us that we neither need nor have the capacity to take risks, have hard conversations, struggle through uncertainty and insecurity, or rely on our own faculties and judgment. In the process, it is producing a generation more alienated, depressed, and lonely than ever before.
In Artificial Intimacy, Sherry Turkle—the psychologist who pioneered our understanding of human-computer relationships—draws on vivid stories as well as decades of experience as a chronicler and analyst of digital culture to present an urgent warning about what these “perfect” companions are doing to our minds and relationships. Tracing our new habit of talking to machines through the human lifecycle—from children’s earliest attachments to how we face death—Turkle offers both a cautionary tale and a roadmap for reclaiming our humanity in the age of AI.
“A necessary exploration of what happens when we seek the comforts of connection over the demands of relationships.”―Esther Perel
“[Turkle is] the most qualified member of Team Humanity to call us back to our senses, and to each other.”―Jonathan Haidt
*This page contains affiliate links, so we may earn a small commission when you make a purchase through links on our site at no additional cost to you.
*This page contains affiliate links, so we may earn a small commission when you make a purchase through links on our site at no additional cost to you.
Average rating from 19 members
Featured Reviews
Shannon L, Reviewer
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
I have been waiting for this book, and wow - it was packed with so much more than I expected. I was so lucky to be in the small group of people that got to play around with the AIM bot SmarterChild and learned to despise it early on for what it was trying to do. Because it was so rudimentary and frankly, kind of rude, it left me feeling really empty and strange afterwards when I did try to communicate with it, and that prescience alone is what kept me away from current-day AI chatbots more than almost anything else. The Original Ick, so to speak. Due to this, I often felt like I was looking into an alternate universe while I was reading, and that was a haunting experience.
This is an incredible read - a must read - and it is hard to put down. It's terrifying and disheartening to read story after story after story of someone who is lonely or anxious or sad turning to a computer for comfort, and then being concerned about their family members who are doing exactly the same thing. Everyone is aware of the limitations of these chatbots; their flaws, their hallucinations, but it's so important that we are honest with ourselves about how much humanity can or should be outsourced to computers, and what happens to us when we do that. You can see the difference in this book alone: just note the humanity among those interviewed here that are searching for connection with chatbots, and the lack of humanity in the voices of those who are selling the products to them. It's a complete world of difference.
Thank you to Little, Brown and Company and Netgalley for the eARC!
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
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Was this review helpful?
Mark K, Educator
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Sherry Turkle’s Artificial Intimacy is a thoughtful and unsettling examination of what happens when we begin turning to machines for companionship, emotional support, and even love. I learned that the greatest concern is not simply what AI can do, but how repeated interactions with agreeable, always-available systems may reshape our expectations of empathy, vulnerability, and reciprocity. The book also helped me see more clearly why genuine care involves shared history, embodied experience, responsibility, and the possibility of disappointment—qualities a chatbot can imitate through language but cannot truly possess. I was especially struck by the exploration of AI’s influence across childhood, adolescence, romance, work, therapy, and grief, as well as the danger that convenience may gradually weaken our capacity for complex human relationships. Turkle does not dismiss the usefulness of AI; instead, she offers a timely invitation to keep it in its proper place while protecting the conversations and communities that make us human. This is an insightful, provocative, and deeply important book that I highly recommend.
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Was this review helpful?
Media/Journalist 1107441
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Sherry Turkle is a reliably thoughtful voice on the sometimes disconcerting intersection of life and technology, and here she turns her attention to people's experience with AI, interviewing many people who have become regularly involved with it (using chatbots for friendship or romance) and also delving into it herself, most fascinatingly by allowing the conjuring of an avatar of her own long-dead mother. She emphasizes the challenges people have with actually understanding that AI can't reflect and feel in a human way, despite any warnings the programs may offer to this effect. She also asks important questions about what happens when people are willing to settle for something that makes them feel good rather than something that is real. It's a sobering book that is, like the other Sherry Turkle books I have read, a very worthwhile read for those trying to understand how people can cope with (and in some cases resist) ever-evolving technology.
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Was this review helpful?
Featured Reviews
Shannon L, Reviewer
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
I have been waiting for this book, and wow - it was packed with so much more than I expected. I was so lucky to be in the small group of people that got to play around with the AIM bot SmarterChild and learned to despise it early on for what it was trying to do. Because it was so rudimentary and frankly, kind of rude, it left me feeling really empty and strange afterwards when I did try to communicate with it, and that prescience alone is what kept me away from current-day AI chatbots more than almost anything else. The Original Ick, so to speak. Due to this, I often felt like I was looking into an alternate universe while I was reading, and that was a haunting experience.
This is an incredible read - a must read - and it is hard to put down. It's terrifying and disheartening to read story after story after story of someone who is lonely or anxious or sad turning to a computer for comfort, and then being concerned about their family members who are doing exactly the same thing. Everyone is aware of the limitations of these chatbots; their flaws, their hallucinations, but it's so important that we are honest with ourselves about how much humanity can or should be outsourced to computers, and what happens to us when we do that. You can see the difference in this book alone: just note the humanity among those interviewed here that are searching for connection with chatbots, and the lack of humanity in the voices of those who are selling the products to them. It's a complete world of difference.
Thank you to Little, Brown and Company and Netgalley for the eARC!
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Was this review helpful?
Mark K, Educator
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Sherry Turkle’s Artificial Intimacy is a thoughtful and unsettling examination of what happens when we begin turning to machines for companionship, emotional support, and even love. I learned that the greatest concern is not simply what AI can do, but how repeated interactions with agreeable, always-available systems may reshape our expectations of empathy, vulnerability, and reciprocity. The book also helped me see more clearly why genuine care involves shared history, embodied experience, responsibility, and the possibility of disappointment—qualities a chatbot can imitate through language but cannot truly possess. I was especially struck by the exploration of AI’s influence across childhood, adolescence, romance, work, therapy, and grief, as well as the danger that convenience may gradually weaken our capacity for complex human relationships. Turkle does not dismiss the usefulness of AI; instead, she offers a timely invitation to keep it in its proper place while protecting the conversations and communities that make us human. This is an insightful, provocative, and deeply important book that I highly recommend.
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Was this review helpful?
Media/Journalist 1107441
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
5 stars
Sherry Turkle is a reliably thoughtful voice on the sometimes disconcerting intersection of life and technology, and here she turns her attention to people's experience with AI, interviewing many people who have become regularly involved with it (using chatbots for friendship or romance) and also delving into it herself, most fascinatingly by allowing the conjuring of an avatar of her own long-dead mother. She emphasizes the challenges people have with actually understanding that AI can't reflect and feel in a human way, despite any warnings the programs may offer to this effect. She also asks important questions about what happens when people are willing to settle for something that makes them feel good rather than something that is real. It's a sobering book that is, like the other Sherry Turkle books I have read, a very worthwhile read for those trying to understand how people can cope with (and in some cases resist) ever-evolving technology.
How to Let Go
Hadley Vlahos, R.N.
Biographies & Memoirs, Parenting, Families, Relationships, Self-Help
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