Brown Girl in the Ring
Memoirs of a brown girl living in Scotland
by Olukemi Ogunyemi
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Pub Date Jul 03 2021 | Archive Date Dec 21 2021
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Description
Brown Girl in the Ring is a beautifully crafted, deeply personal memoir; not only is it the ultimate message on how to put an end to racism, it is a true story for our times.
In this, her first book, she tells of her momentous struggle growing up as a mixed-race child in Scotland. She describes, in horrific, gut-wrenching detail, the treatment she received at the hands of the so-called 'good people' of Scotland; acts of racism that continued into adulthood and wreaked havoc for her as a wife and a mother of four children.
Her captivating story calls out unconscious, racial bias - even in her own family - but through the obvious pain and suffering, she still allows her sense of humour and her deep love for her husband and her children to shine through.
Not content with just telling her story, Ogunyemi spells out her quest to tackle racism head-on, but not with a 'call to arms'. Forget anger and finger-pointing and think more sit-down chat with someone who understands. She lives and breathes compassion, not blame.
Olukemi Ogunyemi is a highly successful body therapist, who also speaks and blogs on racism and transgender issues - olukemiogunyemi.com
Advance Praise
"Her memoir was touching and compelling. A real page turner", Betty Andrews, Amazon review.
"5.0 out of 5 stars - Captivating! I can't put it down..." Shar Ro, Amazon Review
"(Amazon) Amazon Customer
4.0 out of 5 stars A must-read for any Scot who denies that his/her country is racist
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 6 October 2021
Verified Purchase
Adult themes throughout. All credit to New Generation Publishing for taking on this sobering, frank account of the experience of a mixed-race child growing up in Scotland. You thought that down-to-earth, egalitarian Scotland could not be socially and institutionally racist? Think again. Make no mistake, this is an uncompromisingly tough read - not for the faint hearted. Forced into print by her transgender daughter's struggle for acceptance, the murder of George Floyd in Indianapolis (1990) let the genie out of the bottle of hurt which had so blighted Kemi's young life, and proved the catalyst for opening the floodgates of suppressed trauma from her childhood. Written in an almost conversational style (the author is dyslexic), Brown girl in the ring may not scale literary heights, but its candid descriptions of the most unpalatable of physically and emotionally abusive behaviour kept me turning the pages. I read it first through the night - several nights - on my Kindle Paperwhite, and was by turns so gripped, shocked and ultimately angry that I could scarcely put it down. It challenged my long-held perceptions of myself and my native country. What for me makes this courageous book outstanding is that it is also a story of love and the power of Choice, written without rancour, accepting the past, and with hope for the future.
I now have the hardback edition and, to pass to a friend, the paperback.
(Amazon) Rochester Haggis
5.0 out of 5 stars Horrifyingly gripping with real social consciousness
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 3 November 2021
Verified Purchase
I was engaged right from the start. The book is easy to read (hard to put down) but not easy reading. I am usually a dedicated fiction reader but this book is a must. I am blessed with a sheltered upbringing and to think this has been allowed to happen to people in my home country is sickening. It makes me question my ideology, makes me want to be more proactive in making myself a better person so as to help prevent any future occurrence. READ THIS BOOK!
(Amazon) J Magill
5.0 out of 5 stars Humbling, powerful and very engaging
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 27 September 2021
Verified Purchase
This book grabbed me from the outset. Written in a compelling way, as a Scottish person I felt humbled that what Olukemi had experienced was happening on my back doorstep. I had no idea, and for that alone I am grateful this book has been written.
She has an engaging style, well-paced and fluid, with some lessons given within the narrative of how to behave/not behave in very challenging circumstances. This means it is a book the reader learns from, not just about racism in modern Scottish society, but also about love and communication too. Hugely important and I have recommended it already to many people.
(Amazon) heather glaisyer
5.0 out of 5 stars I couldn't put this book down
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 31 August 2021
Verified Purchase
This book grabbed me from the first page. I was aware how much racism there is in scotland but this account of how much it impacts individuals, especially children, is heartbreaking. The personal story is fascinating and horrifying in equal amounts and extremely well written. I thoroughly recommend it.
(Amazon) Sylvia
5.0 out of 5 stars Deeply moving & completely engaging
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 23 September 2021
Verified Purchase
This book should be read by every person in the world!! Kemi is able to take you with her into experiencing what life is like for someone in a brown skin in Scotland or anywhere else in the world. However, the book is light & informative & relevant for anyone who grows up in the world appearing to be different in some way! I’m finding it riveting & applaud the author for her courage in writing about this vital subject!!
(Amazon) gibbous water lentil3
5.0 out of 5 stars page turner, moving, inspirational
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 5 September 2021
As others have commented a 'page turner' indeed. coming from 'white privilege' I found it shocking and moving, that one individual should have been dealt such a difficult hand at such a young age. The courage and bravery she has had to draw on is immense in wresting her children back to a loving home. Even when calling out racism as ignorance Kemi shows her compassion and understanding and I was left feeling that healing is possible.
(Amazon) Ali g
5.0 out of 5 stars Brilliant moving read
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 2 September 2021
Verified Purchase
Read it in two days brilliant sad moving book and really opened my eyes to the racism that goes on every day in people's lives ..we are all so ignorant to the impact
(GoodReads) Olivia Wright rated it it was amazing
I feel so blessed to have read this book so soon after it was published. The strength that Kemi holds in her head and heart is incomparable and I have never been touched so deeply by someone's story.
As a highly privileged white cis woman I have learned so much from Kemi's words. Hearing her story made me so angry on her behalf. I had to but the book down several times, tears in my eyes, thinking ""how the heck can people treat others like this!"". I also learned about damaging micro-aggressions and unconscious bias, particularly in schools and among children. As a future primary school teacher I will be channeling Kemi's powerful, compassionate story into ensuring my classroom is a non-bias, safe space.
What a privilege it was to read this story, I will remember it always.
(GoodReads) ywanderingreads rated it really liked it
Shelves: net-galley, 2021-reads
I was contemplating how to write a review for this without getting too emotional. This was a very heavy read for me and has multiple trigger warnings right, left and center. This is definitely not for the faint-hearted as it covers racism, rape, abusive family and loved ones, trauma, eating disorder and unjust social system. I was so angry, frustrated and heart-broken for Kemi while reading this!
This is a memoir of Olukemi Ogunyemi, who is half Scottish and half Nigerian. She lived with her Scottish mother when her dad went to prison. That’s the beginning of her abuse, from her own mother. She first experience racism when she went to a convenient store and things just got worse from there. Kemi doesn’t understand why she was being treated that way - people disgusted by her skin colour, people hurling hurtful words at her…
Kemi becomes more closed off, being constantly told she is not good enough by her mother and not making any friends. She doesn’t know her self-worth and doesn’t know how to fight for herself. This constant self-loathe took her all the way to adulthood. She was in two abusive relationships where she has no voice until she met Craig! She slowly learned to love and trust again. Kemi has four children and she tries her best to be a good mother but due to certain circumstances, her life was once again thrown into despair and helplessness. Despite it all, she fought hard for her children even when the justice system failed her because of her skin colour, she continued fighting. She found her strength, she found her voice and most of all she found her worth.
Through her ordeal, Kemi had people who supported her and helped her fight the justice system. That really gave her the strength to push on. The events that happened to Kemi are horribly painful and she wrote that things hasn’t changed much from when she was a child to her children’s generation. Her children are still going through the same experiences as Kemi and that is a huge wake up call for her. She goes on to explain the impact of unconscious racial bias and micro-aggressions on coloured community and how it is hard to change the perception of racism that has been there for a long, long time.
This was such an eye opening read and I really enjoyed this even though some things are so painful to read. I really admire Kemi’s compassion, determination and strength to live her life! Thank you Netgalley and Booksgosocial for the arc.
(GoodReads) (a)lyss(a) rated it it was amazing
Shelves: first-reads-and-other-review-copies
I received a copy of this book through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
This is such a heavy read.
Olukemi Ogunyemi shares her experience growing up as a half-Black in Scotland. Starting with her childhood, Ogunyemi opens up about her dysfunctional family and all the racism and hate she's faced in her life. Clearly resented by her mother and later one of her daughters this story is tragic, deep, and painful. Facing barriers at every turn Ogunyemi's life is a difficult read, but also so necessary. She doesn't chalk up many of her experiences up to race, but talks about it as a factor.
This book is full of difficult experiences like assault, abuse, and gaslighting. Yet Ogunyemi shares her harrowing experiences and what she's learned from it all. This book left me wishing her nothing but a good life after such a raw and honest read.
(GoodReads) Shirley rated it it was amazing
Shelves: read-in-2021
Book 67 of 2021.
Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with this book for an honest review..
Brown Girl in the Ring tells the stories of Olukemi Ogunyemi and her family. Whilst there are many horrific moments that Olukemi and her family members went through, the story tells clearly explains the extent that racism can have on people through multiple generations. To see that things hadn’t changed much from when she was a child to when her children were going through the same experiences is quite horrific and something that shouldn’t be happening. The story showed the complexity of families with the roller coaster ride that they can often go on getting through life and everything it throws at you and the impact that the big moments in life have on multiple people written in a way that flowed.
Available Editions
| ISBN | 9781800310667 |
| PRICE | £4.99 (GBP) |
Links
Available on NetGalley
Featured Reviews
Jill T, Reviewer
Wow! Brown Girl in the Ring, by Olukemi Ogunyemi, is such an important & timely book.
First, let's get some trigger warnings out of the way: racism (obviously), child abuse (physical & extreme psychological), rape, anorexia, domestic abuse (physical & extreme psychological), parental abuse (physical & extreme psychological), abuse by the government & homophobia.
There is so much to unpack with this book. The main character, Kemi is a fellow proud Mama Bear. She had to endure so much, starting with a mom who comes off as racist, abusive and having Narcissistic Personality Disorder. She appears to insert herself &/or try to sabotage every relationship that isn't with her, including ones with her own siblings. Thank God for the loving influences of her Scottish grandparents and her Nigerian extended family. Then there's the racist, insecure boys that she dated, one of which who also seems to have NPD. Since it was so triggering for me, I couldn't read all the parts that detailed the domestic abuse.
Then her oldest daughter gets in on the action and not only does she abuse her entire immediate family, she brings the government in on the action. Child welfare does their typical work towards causing family trauma and not offering any necessary, easily available (in house) services. The oldest has supposedly been traumatized but they don't seem to do a full evaluation, therapy or family therapy. Though it all, she deals with everything in love and with determination.
Shelia E, Reviewer
Brown Girl in the Ring, by Olukemi Ogunyemi, is a book of her memoirs that is raw and from the depths of her soul. Some readers may be affected by these triggers: domestic violence, traumatization by powers to be, child abuse, discrimination, and unconscious racial bias.
The main character, Kemi, started her young life in England as a mixed Scottish-Nigerian model. She was her mother's accessory. When she moved to Scotland, she became very curious. Moreover, her brown skin and English accent made her get ordered out of the store rudely. When she returned home, she could not understand why her entire family was angry at her. All she did was ask for candy in her English accent in her brown body. After this untimely incident, she faced racism for the rest of her life. She became a lioness to her four children in this world against the system. Kemi climbed many mountains in her tumultuous life. Also, Kemi became an inspiration. She fought the system and became very successful. I felt like I was going through with her at times.
This book was such a great read. I could not put it down! Kemi's memoirs covered so many topics, areas, and age groups. I believe that this book will be of interest to many because it covers a variety of subjects.
Shirley B, Reviewer
Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with this book for an honest review..
Brown Girl in the Ring tells the stories of Olukemi Ogunyemi and her family. Whilst there are many horrific moments that Olukemi and her family members went through, the story tells clearly explains the extent that racism can have on people through multiple generations. To see that things hadn’t changed much from when she was a child to when her children were going through the same experiences is quite horrific and something that shouldn’t be happening. The story showed the complexity of families with the roller coaster ride that they can often go on getting through life and everything it throws at you and the impact that the big moments in life have on multiple people written in a way that flowed.
YiWen S, Reviewer
I was contemplating how to write a review for this without getting too emotional. This was a very heavy read for me and has multiple trigger warnings right, left and center. This is definitely not for the faint-hearted as it covers racism, rape, abusive family and loved ones, trauma, eating disorder and unjust social system. I was so angry, frustrated and heart-broken for Kemi while reading this!
This is a memoir of Olukemi Ogunyemi, who is half Scottish and half Nigerian. She lived with her Scottish mother when her dad went to prison. That’s the beginning of her abuse, from her own mother. She first experience racism when she went to a convenient store and things just got worse from there. Kemi doesn’t understand why she was being treated that way - people disgusted by her skin colour, people hurling hurtful words at her…
Kemi becomes more closed off, being constantly told she is not good enough by her mother and not making any friends. She doesn’t know her self-worth and doesn’t know how to fight for herself. This constant self-loathe took her all the way to adulthood. She was in two abusive relationships where she has no voice until she met Craig! She slowly learned to love and trust again. Kemi has four children and she tries her best to be a good mother but due to certain circumstances, her life was once again thrown into despair and helplessness. Despite it all, she fought hard for her children even when the justice system failed her because of her skin colour, she continued fighting. She found her strength, she found her voice and most of all she found her worth.
Through her ordeal, Kemi had people who supported her and helped her fight the justice system. That really gave her the strength to push on. The events that happened to Kemi are horribly painful and she wrote that things hasn’t changed much from when she was a child to her children’s generation. Her children are still going through the same experiences as Kemi and that is a huge wake up call for her. She goes on to explain the impact of unconscious racial bias and micro-aggressions on coloured community and how it is hard to change the perception of racism that has been there for a long, long time.
This was such an eye opening read and I really enjoyed this even though some things are so painful to read. I really admire Kemi’s compassion, determination and strength to live her life! Thank you Netgalley and Booksgosocial for the arc.
Alyssa M, Reviewer
I received a copy of this book through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
This is such a heavy read.
Olukemi Ogunyemi shares her experience growing up as a half-Black in Scotland. Starting with her childhood, Ogunyemi opens up about her dysfunctional family and all the racism and hate she's faced in her life. Clearly resented by her mother and later one of her daughters this story is tragic, deep, and painful. Facing barriers at every turn Ogunyemi's life is a difficult read, but also so necessary. She doesn't chalk up many of her experiences up to race, but talks about it as a factor.
This book is full of difficult experiences like assault, abuse, and gaslighting. Yet Ogunyemi shares her harrowing experiences and what she's learned from it all. This book left me wishing her nothing but a good life after such a raw and honest read.
Librarian 107287
This is a belated review of the book. I found it hard to start, I have, since Black Lives Matter, read and listened to a number of books regarding black history, fiction written by black Americans and Nigerians and now this. I am blown away by what has happened to Kemi and her family and wonder how it could have happened in this day and age, I misguidedly thought Britain was beyond this. How wrong I was. I was really ignorant of what families could go through. Thank goodness for the good guys who gave unwavering support. It is a heart wrenching read, which should make everyone think about racism, overt and hidden and especially about structural racism. Thank you Kemi for telling it and I hope you have found some peace in the years since you finished the book.
Tara K, Reviewer
This is an emotional read, one which should make everyone think about racism, especially about structural racism. This is not an easy read, it’s heart-breaking, painful, and despairing, it is a survival story, but she paid a horrendous price for it. Triggers of domestic violence, child abuse, discrimination
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
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