What I Wish I Knew

Surviving and Thriving After an Abusive Relationship

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Pub Date 10 Jan 2022 | Archive Date 15 Apr 2022

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Description

Trauma-Informed Psychotherapist Empowers Survivors to Thrive After an Abusive Relationship in Innovative New Book

What I Wish I Knew: Surviving and Thriving After an Abusive Relationship

Written by co-authors Amelia Kelley, Ph.D., MS, LCMHC, ATR, RYT and survivor Kendall Ann Combs

“Experiencing emotional or physical abuse is so isolating, and this book reads like a trusted friend. For people who are trying to figure out whether what they are experiencing is normal or toxic, to those who have managed to extricate themselves from the clutches of abuse – this is a power resource.”  – Mario Guido, Executive Editor of ScaryMommy.com


Whether you are a survivor of domestic violence, or in a relationship wrought with intimidation, gaslighting or control of any kind, it’s time to regain the part of yourself that you may have lost and find your support network to regain living your true authentic life. In What I Wish I Knew: Surviving and Thriving After an Abusive Relationship written by co-author Dr. Amelia Kelley (and survivor Kendall Ann Combs), the authors use the journey of Ms. Combs’ tragic relationship experience along with Dr. Kelley’s trauma-informed, psychotherapist techniques and real strategies to support women and men who have experienced toxic, unhealthy, abusive relationships. Dr. Kelley’s whole health approach to healing and self-care is critical for those suffering from violence and other forms of relationship abuse. She shares eye-opening anecdotes, cutting-edge research, facts, and intimate wisdom in this much needed, gripping guide.


The statistics of physical abuse in relationships are still astounding as 1 in 3 women have been abused by an intimate partner in their lifetime according to the United States Center for Disease Control and Prevention. However, emotional abuse is almost equal for both genders, with close to half of both having experienced at least one form of psychological aggression by an intimate partner (which can include gaslighting, coercive control, being insulted, humiliated, or acted upon in a dangerous manner). CDC/2018* In addition, COVID 19 exacerbated alarming statistics regarding domestic violence and emotional abuse in the U.S. (NIH**).


What I Wish I Knew is part memoir by Ms. Combs about her former relationship, and part therapy and advice by Dr. Kelley who has worked with abuse survivors for over fifteen years. Throughout her career, Dr. Kelley has focused her research and training on serving those recovering from trauma, resulting in attachment and relationship issues. The book provides resources for those trying to break the cycle of abuse as well as recognize when your relationship is unhealthy and maybe even dangerous. Additionally, What I Wish I Knew can serve as a resource for those in helping professions, or for loved ones supporting someone in an abusive relationship.


In the new age of #MeToo and Time’s Up, women have become emboldened to speak up about what they really want in consensual relationships. Dr. Kelley gives advice on how to stop people pleasing and let go of self-doubt to finally find the fulfilling relationship you desire and deserve no matter where you are in your life journey – Gen Z, Millennial, Gen Xer, or Boomer.


The Book’s Back Story:

Co-author Kendall Ann Combs is a survivor of domestic violence who offers help and support to others going through similar situations with her podcast, “High Heels and Heartache.” She offers advice to survivors and those currently in abusive relationships as a free resource. On her podcast she discusses relationship issues to help her listeners recover from toxic, unhealthy, and abusive relationships. Dr. Amelia Kelley is a licensed therapist who came across Ms. Combs’ podcast by chance. After reaching out to Ms. Combs, they created a powerful episode exploring how trauma impacts the body. Since then, the two have supported one another’s mission to bring healing to those experiencing abuse and trauma in their relationships.


In What I Wish I Knew, Dr. Kelley imparts invaluable knowledge:

• How To Become Self-Empowered After an Abusive Relationship.

• How To Detect If It’s a Fairytale or Love Bombing?

• Recognizing Emotional Abuse – Gaslighting, Intimidation, the Silent Treatment, Coercion, Isolation, and so much more …

• Hard Truths of Negative Self Talk

• Breaking Boundaries with Sexual Abuse

• The Effects of Violence on the Body and Mind

• The Stages of Leaving and the Exit Plan

• The Aftermath of PTSD, Trauma and Your Brain, and Reaching out for Help

• Ways to Recognize and Avoid Future Abuse

• How to Start Your Healing Journey

• Trusting Love Again and Rebuilding Relationships

 ###

About Dr. Amelia Kelley

Amelia Kelley Ph.D., MS, LCMHC, ATR, RYT is a trauma-informed therapist who has conducted research on the effects of exercise on ADHD symptoms as well as the effects of resiliency on PTSD. She is a trained Hypno-therapist, Art therapist, HSP Therapist, EMDR-informed therapist and meditation and Yoga teacher. She is a presenter and writer in the “science-help” field focusing on relationships, Highly Sensitive Persons, trauma, motivation, healthy living, and adult ADHD. She is a guest podcast presenter focusing on women’s issues and coping with the trauma of unhealthy relationships, as well as a coach and trainer for SAS's Work/Life Program in Cary, NC and a resident trainer for the NC Art Therapy Institute. Her practice is also currently part of the Traumatic Stress Research Consortium at the Kinsey Institute. www.Ameliakelley.com

Connect with Dr. Amelia Kelley at:

What I Wish I Knew (@WhatIWishIKnew4) / Twitter What I Wish I Knew | Facebook

https://www.instagram.com/whatiwishiknewthebook


*https://www.ananiasfoundation.org/domestic-violence-statistics/

** https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7195322/


Trauma-Informed Psychotherapist Empowers Survivors to Thrive After an Abusive Relationship in Innovative New Book

What I Wish I Knew: Surviving and Thriving After an Abusive Relationship

Written by...


Advance Praise

“Experiencing emotional or physical abuse is so isolating, and this book reads like a trusted friend. For people who are trying to figure out whether what they are experiencing is normal or toxic, to those who have managed to extricate themselves from the clutches of abuse – this is a power resource.”

 – Mario Guido, Executive Editor of ScaryMommy.com


“Experiencing emotional or physical abuse is so isolating, and this book reads like a trusted friend. For people who are trying to figure out whether what they are experiencing is normal or toxic, to...


Marketing Plan

Blog Hop & Book Influencer Review Tour

National publicity tour

20 city Radio Satellite Interview Tour

Podcast Interview Tour

Book Giveaways and Excerpts


Blog Hop & Book Influencer Review Tour

National publicity tour

20 city Radio Satellite Interview Tour

Podcast Interview Tour

Book Giveaways and Excerpts



Available Editions

EDITION Paperback
ISBN 9781684898732
PRICE $17.99 (USD)

Available on NetGalley

NetGalley Shelf App (PDF)
Send to Kindle (PDF)

Average rating from 6 members


Featured Reviews

Kendall Ann Combs gives us the gift of her own story - with short, riveting narratives that had me rooting for her, followed by a really simple analysis by her and her co-author Dr. Amelia Kelly where they analyze what just happened, the patterns to look for and then specific tools and worksheets to apply to your own situation. I read this book to be more helpful to a close friend. In that sense, I found that Kendall Ann's case is a particularly acute case of abuse, and I found myself grieving for her, yet only partially able to relate to my friend's situation. This is no criticism of the book or the style it is written in; the personal narrative is what makes this book really accessible and riveting, I would probably have had to labor much more on a more theoretical/clinical treatment of this difficult subject. I found the analytical tools to be particularly accessible through her story, understanding the cycle of abuse, the power of control wheel, DEAR MAN frames as examples of tools that would be much harder to grasp without her storytelling style. Overall, a well written, powerful read that really left me with tools for reflection.

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"What I Wish I Knew" is a a complete lifesaver. For those who are wanting to keep safe, sane, and straw away from any form of relational toxicity, this is the book to get. I highly recommend!

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𝐆𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧.

Ladies, if you are looking for a relationship, have been in a previous abusive (any kind) relationship, are currently in a relationship and your gut is telling you this isn’t what love should look like, OR know anyone who could possibly fall into any of the above categories…GET THIS BOOK NOW!

I wish this book was around when I myself was in an abusive relationship 20yrs ago. I was an educated strong women and found myself fall victim to abuse.

Kendall Ann’s story of her past abusive relationship was very similar to mine and coupled with Dr Amelia Kelley’s teachings on boundaries, self-care, gaslighting, and more is pure innovation and all therapists who sees women of trauma needs this book!

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𝘗𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘶𝘭, 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘢𝘭!

Not an easy to read at all, but I do think this book is a fantastic resource for anyone who had or is experiencing any kind of abuse. I loved how each chapter shares a part of Kendall’s story followed by an analysis by Dr. Kelley, part memoir and part self-help. An amazing story of survival that you need to read.

Thank you Suzy Approved Book Tours for having me on this tour.

What I Wish I Knew by What I Wish I Knew released January 10, 2022.

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