An Unseen Angel

On December 14th, 2012, America & beyond was sent into utter shock at the brutality and tragedy that took place at Sandy Hook Elementary. One of the 20 children murdered that day was Emilie Parker, who had immediate family connections to Ogden, Utah. Close to where we lived and also a member of the same faith, I felt an extra level of compassion towards this family. As a mother of a then Kindergartener, my first thoughts were to not even take him to school that afternoon. He had half days, and I caught the news as we were getting ready to go. With heavy heart, I approached our school like most parents probably did, with anxiety in my soul. I stopped in the office to talk to the staff who hadn't heard the news yet. Needing to talk I stayed for a little longer than I usually would. After this event our school took on new ways to implement added security, though it was still hard to send my little ones off to school. Like most parents, what happened at Sandy Hook that day - deeply affected us all.

For Robbie & Alissa Parker, Emilie's parents, they were thrown into a living nightmare. One of my supervisors at work lived close to Alissa's family, and knew them well. She would tell us about the grief they were feeling as a community, and gave us a little insight. We worked together in a Bookstore & Clothing Distribution Store, owned by our Church. I was blessed to be working in the Distribution Center at the time, and it was a great blessing to me to be touched by the sensitivity of my supervisors thoughts, and the Spirit, as we went about our work. I recall one day I arrived at work, and was told Alissa & Robbie had just been in there. I was so grateful that I had not been on shift. What would I have said or done? I've been in that situation of deep grief over a immediate family member, and feel empathy for those who are suffering too. It still doesn't make it easier to express that. As I went about my work, I suddenly felt prompted I should stop and pray for the Parkers. "Hey!" I thought. Just how am I supposed to do this in the store? It was unusually quiet, and I decided to step into the Temple Room, which is a small quiet room in which we keep our sacred temple clothing, and spend time with those going to the Temple. It's a beautiful space to me, small, and nothing stunning in design. But I always loved going in there with people preparing for a special moment in their spiritual journey. I went in and knelt down and the Spirit overcame me in such a powerful way. I pled with God to touch their lives with peace, to help them feel His presence. It was short, and I got up and went straight back to my work, but I'll never forget the prompting or that moment. Grateful I had somewhere peaceful I could stop and act.

It's been 4 years since that dreadful day, and occasionally I've wondered how they were coping. How they managed to go forward. Survive. A few weeks ago this book 'An Unseen Angel' by Alissa Parker popped up in my books to review collection for Shadow Mountain Publishing. I felt a gut wrenching ache. There is no way I can read that book I thought. Just no way. I'm just going to have to skip over it and move onto the next fiction book waiting in line. I felt the same in-trepidation I felt over picking up Elizabeth Smart's book. It took me months before I could face that one. Today, I decided to pick it up. The first 25% of this book I literally sobbed with tears pouring down my face. I don't even know where Alissa found the courage to write these words. As I turned the pages though I felt utterly astounded and amazed at the ability, the faith, the determined will to survive this. At the outpouring of love that came their way. Do not knock the human race. The blessings that poured from people in their community and all over the United States reminded me that despite all the troubles we face, all the conflict, differences of opinion etc, love abounds.

Alissa has so poignantly invited us to share in this unbelievably heartbreaking journey. I can't imagine her bravery, to open her private thoughts, emotions & experiences and share them with us.

If you're feeling like you're in a bad place, upset, angry, struggling, in need of hope... seek out this book. It will be released in April, and I tell you, you will see your life a little differently.

What touched me the most was the special, sacred experiences they have encountered individually and as a couple as they have walked, cried, mourned this difficult road. The recognition that Emilie has been there, touched their lives and many others in unique and special ways is testimony building. The moments, the people, the way events fell into place before the tragedy and after. When you loose a loved one, that you have been very close to, and especially when it's been unexpected or too soon, you are occasionally blessed with 'moments'. They won't be like you expect or probably wish for, and you can't even explain them to another person, without taking away the sacredness of it. I have experienced it, and I believe in every, single, one of these experiences Alissa has eloquently shared.

Thank you to Shadow Mountain & Netgalley for the complimentary copy. This is my honest review.