F*ck No!

I pretty much worship at the altar of Sarah Knight witty, curse-filled wisdom, so I had high expectations for her latest self-help book.

In case you’re not familiar with her works, Sarah Knight has written four previous self-help books on the topics of not giving a f**k what others think, getting your s**t together, just being yourself, and staying calm in tense situations. I’ve read all of her previous books, own a few of them, and frequently pull them off the shelf when I need some advice. I find her advice to be practical, helpful and the survey results she includes make you realize you’re not alone with your messy life.

Saying no to other people is something I’ve always struggled with, and I’ve never clicked on ‘request ARC’ faster. I’m a bit of a reformed perfectionist but I still struggle with people-pleasing, which often leaves me saying yes to more things than my mental health can handle. So, I’m more than aware that I should say no more, but I’m more at odds about what exactly to say to people.

In this guide, Knight lays out several techniques for saying no for a variety of categories, including requests from strangers, telemarketers, friends, bosses, coworkers, and family. She offers several different types of ‘no’s’ for you to try. My favorite thing about this guide is that Knight is realistic about saying no. She values politeness and honesty when possible but realizes the value of a white lie in certain cases. She also points out that in some cases, saying yes can be more valuable to you in the long run than saying no, which is a sad but true fact of life. Sometimes, a little bit of annoy is worth more joy in the long run. BUT I do appreciate that Knight helps you draw a line between what is necessary and what is just more busywork for you.

Sarah Knight gives good advice in a humorous way. This author takes a compelling approach to thinking through a word that many find hard to say.

I love Sarah Knight's books. They make you think, reflect, and remind you that you do not need to live to appease others. It is a nice reminder to make decisions for oneself and recognize that it is okay to say no. As a person who always wants to be there for other people, and often feeling over extended beyond my capacity, I needed to hear this message. This book was made for me.

How does someone get better at saying "No?" Why would you want to be better at saying no? According to Sarah Knight and her successful series of books that tackle everything from not giving a f*ck to putting oneself first, there is a myriad of tricks and practices everyone who has problems with saying no can learn out of the safety of their lounge.

How is this book written for the audience?

Sarah Knight has made a successful career out of helping people face their fears and shortcomings, and she continues this stride with her latest book, F*ck No!: How to Stop Saying Yes When You Can't, You Shouldn't, or You Just Don't Want To. Sarah is a TED speaker and a New York Times bestselling author. So what makes it so easy for some of us to say no, and why is it so hard for others? Sarah speaks from personal experience as a full-time corporate book editor who got tired of giving authors lousy news daily. Ask yourself if you have ever been the person that always has to please everyone? Or the push-over that always caves when they should stand their ground? Or even the overachiever that takes on way too much work for minimal reward or none at all? If you can relate to any of these scenarios, you will benefit greatly from reading this book.

Some of the highlights of this book included the following advice that Sarah offers unapologetically to the reader:

- Building real, applicable boundaries for yourself and those people in your life you find it hard to say no to. These people can be family members, friends, bosses or colleagues. It doesn't matter because Sarah's advice can be moulded around to fit with any relationship that you have.
- Having personal policies that help you to apply the boundaries you've created to real-world situations.
- Dealing with those people that won't take "no" for an answer and how to continue being in control when you don't feel in control
- Dealing with the guilt of saying "no" in a responsible way that can come in many shapes and forms
- Approaching the "fall out" or consequences of saying "no" and working to move beyond these limitations

The language used – is it simple enough to understand for the everyday reader?

One of the essential concepts in Sarah's book is that not all situations and examples will be something you can relate to. This book is structured in such a way that you can skip and re-read sections that are relevant to you and your life. After all, this book is all about improving yourself, and only you know where that improvement needs to be applied.

As an example, I'll use my own experience here - I don't have a single problem with telling telemarketers "no" or telling door-to-door sellers "no, but thank you!" But some people might. Sarah has thought about her material extensively, and I do mean that this book is extremely comprehensive and covers just about every situation you could imagine and then some. So again, you can pick up this book and apply what you've learned to Sarah's material - look at the chapters you want to look at and ignore the rest. Or, if you're a completionist (like I tend to be), read the entire book and apply only what you know to be relevant when required. It is that simple.

That said, however, the language used in this book may be a little "blunt" for some readers. Not all readers will appreciate the way Sarah uses certain words (mostly slang and swear words) in her writing. So this book won't appeal to everyone. But I enjoyed the stripped-down nature of the book, and its rawness made it easier for me to feel comfortable reading about difficult situations. I prefer the no-nonsense approach.

What can be gained from the book – does it educate the reader?

I didn't choose to review this book because of any particular need that I had other than I wanted to read it because I thought the subject matter would be interesting. And I also appreciate the way that Sarah approaches her material. But the further into this book I progressed the more I began to realise that this book is addressing experiences I have had. I remember feeling like I couldn't breathe or like I was choking because of the pressure other people in my life were putting onto me. I remember the horrible feeling that crept over me whenever I said "yes" to a person I didn't like. I remember how annoyed and disgusted with myself I felt because I had given into the guilt, yet again. I am one of the people that Sarah has spent a considerable chunk of her career trying to reach out to. Perhaps something subconsciously was telling me I needed to read this book. Maybe the experience can be the same for you too. This book could be a revelation or could provide clarity into your shortcomings or even deeper than that.

Thank you for the opportunity to read and review another wonderful book from Knight. I love her work! I felt like this book was written for me!! "how to stop saying yes when you can''t" YES! I really enjoy her writing style and how she is not just harping at you. It feels like she is talking to you and telling you how you can really change in a practical way.

While I don't like swearing I have found that the most well-written of these types of book actually use the 'word' to hook you in, and then teach you something about boundaries. This is an excellent example of that. Readable, witty, and most of all - useful. It's a shame that many people won't buy it because of the swearing because it's teaching me some genuinely useful techniques.

With it's attention grabbing title; and being familiar with Sarah Knight's previous novels / style of writing; I was quick to download this ARC; finding it was exactly what I needed. A no nonsense, witty book about the art of saying no; perfect for a people pleaser and overachiever such as myself.

This book was received as an ARC Little, Brown and Company - Voracious in exchange for an honest review. Opinions and thoughts expressed in this review are completely my own.

I absolutely love Sarah Knight's series and while using language that is common for the everyday people even if it's not deemed appropriate. All in all the book talks about the power of the word No. No Sarah claims is appropriate to say when you are in a situation that is uncomfortable or hard to process. This is the book for the person that feels pressure from their family and people around them and Sarah reaffirms that you have the right to only do what is best for you regardless of what anyone thinks. I know this was a such a breath of fresh air to read and a lot of our community will appreciate and love this book as much as I do.

We will consider adding this title to our Self-Help collection at our library. That is why we give this book 5 stars.

Let me preface this review by saying that I love Sarah Knight. I've read all of her books so far and there's something about her profanity-filled positivity that fills me with joy. F*ck No! was absolutely another win for Knight.

This book is an answer to a problem that so many of us, especially women, have in our lives: how hard it is to say no. Setting boundaries is tough and this book takes a real, grounded look at how to do that without feeling inundated with the guilt that we're used to feeling. Sarah Knight has definitely delivered another success and I enjoyed this very much. It was insightful and relatable on so many levels.

Who knew we needed an instruction book for how to say "no"--literally, *how to say 'no'*? After reading "F*uck No!," I think we do! Knight writes this guide in her light, laugh-out-loud style, presenting outright practical advice for figuring out why you feel you can't say "no" in any given situation (from personal to business) and crafting your "no" to the very word. I think a lot of people will see themselves in this book and feel some validation in their yes-man angst. (I did.) I also think Knight's wisdom and logic will create a cascade of nos (no's?) in 2020. Be careful what you ask me to do...

An easy read and a good gift book for friends who always say yes and who don't mind judicious use of f-bombs in their literature.

I enjoy Sarah Knight's book so much. Her blunt wisdom and practical techniques are approachable and relatable. I am working on being less of a “yes” person and one of the biggest things I have learned(and am still working on!) is that saying “NO” can actually help you say “YES” to the things that really matter to you.

In F*ck No, Knight offers practical ideas that can help you say "no" in a variety of circumstances while also being realistic about it which I really appreciated. Saying yes all the time sounds like a good thing, but then you just feel spread too thin and aren’t really there for the people and things that you really want to be prioritizing. Her insights are the perfect balance of humor and useful tools to help work towards our own individual goals of setting boundaries in real-world situations.

I got so much out this one and I highly recommend it! Thank you to NetGalley and Little, Brown & Company for an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

A witty, funny and fast book. Sarah gives many examples and illustrations to prove her point. I had a great time reading this while waiting for some appointments. I would certainly recommend this book.

I found this book very helpful and funny! I really liked the examples and anecdotes. I was able to relate to some of the examples and going to give it a go to say "no" and mean it! If you struggle to say "NO" you need to pick this book up.
Thank you Netgalley, Sarah Knight, Little, Brown and Company, and for providing me with an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

As someone who has trouble saying no, I found this book both humorous and helpful! I really liked that she gave multiple examples & anecdotes.

Thank you Sarah Knight, Little, Brown and Company, and Netgalley for providing me with an advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

#fuckno #NetGalley

What an enjoyable read! I'm hopeless at saying no so I now feel much more equipped to deal with denying others at my own cost. Recommend to everyone!

Dammit I hate it when the GR app “loses” your incomplete review because you dared switch to another page to look up the meaning of a word so as to not appear a complete ignoramus, sigh. I thought they were working on that. Never mind, starting again...

I don’t read many self-help books, mainly because in my experience they are usually repetitive and patronising collections of personal anecdotes and tortuous reworkings of the central premise (usually the title), padded out over 300 pages. However, I saw this on NetGalley and decided it was an area I could use some help with, and found it an amusing light-hearted guide to navigating personal relationships, which doesn’t take itself too seriously, that I will probably re-read in future.

This turns out to be the fifth book in the author’s “No F***s Given Guides” which began with “The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a F***” which I had heard of but conflated in my mind with “The Subtle Art if Not Giving a F***” - I imagine these two best-sellers cover similar territory but had not read either, for reasons stated above. I haven’t read Marie Kondo either although do like her lesson on how to fold a T-shirt. Having clearly found a market, Sarah Knight has gone on to explore related areas like getting organised and celebrating your individuality, and this time she tackles that seemingly innocuous but surprisingly difficult challenge that we all face: saying no!

Explaining that people who have difficulty saying No fall in to four different personality types - People pleasers, Overachievers, FOMO and Pushovers - or combinations thereof (surprise surprise I’m all of these), she starts by exploring the reasons why we have such difficulty turning down requests, be they from colleagues, friends, family or even complete strangers. She breaks these down into chapters with plenty of examples and a few well-chosen and not-too-annoying anecdotes. I like her writing style but if the liberal use of the F-word offends you, you should buy a different book. (Similarly Trump-supporters and the highly religious should skip this one.)

Reading this made me reflect that I have already become a lot better at saying No - to extra work-shifts, to requests to borrow money, to loaning things, but it’s the way I feel about it afterwards - sleepless nights, anxiety about the impact on my relationships, angst about being a bad person... so I think the no-nonsense way she points out that other people aren’t necessarily thinking what you thare no they are, very helpful. I’m even going to apply this to my reviewing - just because an author or publisher I’ve never heard of reaches out to ask me to review their novel, doesn’t mean I have to...

Yes it gets repetitive, but that didn’t bother me as the general idea is to learn how to use the same principles in different situations - deciding when to reject/decline a request, being polite and/or honest about it, backing yourself and avoiding the associated guilt (the bit I struggle with the most) - which as she points out is mostly self-inflicted. Having stock phrases ready in advance, buying yourself time when caught unprepared, suggested ways of softening your rejection, were all concepts that seem very obvious but made a lot of sense to me. I am actually now tempted to read TLCMONGAF!

My thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the arc which allowed me to give an honest review. F*** No is available on 31st December.

I love anything by this author and this book falls in line with that mindset. I am not a people pleaser or a yes person. I still found the book funny and I can’t wait to suggest it for anyone struggling to say NO.

I enjoyed this book. I am fairly new to self-help books but I think this was a great start. The humor in it made it intriguing. The example situations were fairly relatable as well. I do wish there were more examples, especially in relation to work.

Overall I would recommend to anyone who has found themselves doing something they did not want to just because they could not say "no."

I love how timely Sarah Knight's books come into my life. In F*ck No, not only does she presents creative answers to a varied range of situations, but the book can help you (like I'm trying to convince myself right now) to understand when someone says "No" to you.

Yes, it can be hard, yes, it's not easy, but we need to say no and choose ourselves before everybody else. But you have to understand that if you ask something to someone, they too can choose themselves. That's the hardest part!

Like in every book, Sarah's sarcasm is priceless. I haven't realized how many puns you could do with "No"... It's really funny!

Many thanks to Little, Brown and Company for the complimentary e-copy of this book through NetGalley. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.

4 stars!

I've read (I think) almost all Sarah Knight's book and I adore each one of them.
This book, particularly, because it dwells with the issue so close to my personal life. I'm the pushover, the people pleaser, the one who has difficulty in saying no, and the one who does say no occasionally but feels bad afterwards.

Sarah wrote the step by step in separating the personalities (on why we say yes to most, if not, all things), how to check and keep our boundaries, and how to say no. She also nicely mention the discomfort that may arise once we do say no.

After all, it's an honest and important book. I just wish I have more time to learn on it. I'm on a reading slump and still some books left to review. Will purchase this for future reference!

love love this book. Funny and to the point. A self help love book that I can identify with. I would recommend it to my friends.

I have a problem. The same problem that many people suffer from. I say “yes”, when I really want to say “no”. This is seen a lot when it comes to plans. I’ll say “yes” because I feel like I should. If I was invited, then I should go. But the day of, I have anxiety and I try to find ways to get out of it, sometimes unsuccessfully. When I saw this book to review on Netgalley, I downloaded it right away. I loved Sarah Knights other books, and I was hoping she would teach me the art of just saying NO!

This book was great! I learned a lot and actually started putting what I learned into practice. I was able to say “no” to two Christmas parties that I didn’t want to go to. I said no right away (nicely of course) and then didn’t think about it again.

Do yourself a favor and pick up this book. If you are the kind of person to say “yes” in your personal or professional life when you really want to say “no” this is the book for you!